This was not how it was supposed to be.
When I chose “present” as my One Word for this year, I had visions of how it would play out. (I do this every year, and I should know better by now that my One Word is my guide, not the other way around.) Being present meant I would set aside my phone more often and focus on the people in front of me. I would spend more time with my kids, doing crafts and reading books with them, things I often neglect because I’m caught up in an online world of my own making. I would worry less and pay attention more. It would be lovely and transformative and peaceful.
But two weeks into the new year, my body decided it had different plans. Muscle spasms in my lower back had me writhing in pain anytime I tried to take a step and for the better part of a month, I was confined to bed while the world spun on without me. Other than trips to the chiropractor’s office, I didn’t leave my house.
My world shrank to the number of steps between the bed and the bathroom, my time to measurements of 15 minutes as I rotated the ice pack on and off my back.
I could not do; I could only be. I could make no plans for the future, only for today.
Read the rest over at OneWord365.
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