Beauty on the Backroads

Stories of grace for life's unexpected turns

leadership

What it takes to change the world

I hesitated before I clicked the link on the story.

I’m a notorious scroller through my newsfeed, consuming headlines and scanning for an overview of information rather than reading every single word. When I click a link to a story, it has to be worth it. My time is limited (so I think) and I only want to read the best stuff. Or the important stuff.

As much as I hate “click bait” headlines, this one was hard to ignore.

Rip currents swept away a Florida family. Then beachgoers formed a human chain.”

First, I watched a video, which featured an interview with the victims. While I was glad they were alive, the story the video told was not what I was looking for. I wanted to know about the human chain. About how it started and who, if anyone, led the way.

The video had not affected me emotionally, so I was surprised that when I read the article I was crying real tears and I could not stop the flow of them.

With 10 people stranded in a rip current and law enforcement waiting for a rescue boat, ordinary people enjoying the beach that day decided to take action. And they changed the story. What could have been a tragedy is now a legendary tale of everyday heroics.

And how they did it is all the encouragement any of us need to change the world.

Photo by Margarida CSilva on Unsplash

First, they decided to do something about it.

“These people are not drowning today,” Jessica Simmons thought, she told the Panama City News Herald. “It’s not happening. We’re going to get them out.” (Quoted in The Washington Post.)

This is the first step any one of us can take to effect change.

Whatever that thing is that’s happening in front of us that isn’t right, we can do something about it just by deciding to participate and not be a bystander.

Not today. Not on my watch. Not if I can help it.

Next, they recognized their strengths.

The woman who made this decision did so because she knew she was a strong swimmer. She did not enter the water on a passionate whim. That may have been what got some of the people into trouble, although I’d rather be the kind of person who jumps into the water to help than stands by waiting for someone else to help.

Her action was fueled by her conviction that she could do it. How many of us walk through life wanting to make a difference but believing that we can’t? I wonder what the world would be like if we took an honest look at our strengths and put them into action when a need crossed our paths.

Then, they used what they had on hand: surfboards and boogie boards and their own bodies.

It sounds like there wasn’t any professional rescue equipment on the beach at the time of the rescue. People grabbed what they had with them, the stuff they brought to the beach so they could enjoy the water.

I tell people all the time that I have no special skills when it comes to volunteering with a refugee resettlement agency. I don’t speak a language other than English. I’m not a teacher. I don’t have a law degree or social work training. But I’ve quickly learned that I can bring what I have: a working knowledge of American culture, life experience living in the U.S., a friendly smile, an incurable case of curiosity and a fierce loyalty for the newly arrived residents of our community.

Photo by Om Prakash Sethia on Unsplash

One of the most powerful messages I’ve ever heard from a non-profit centered around the question “What do you have in your hands?” The organization funds and distributes micro-loans in developing countries and it’s the question that disarms helplessness. We all have resources, experience, talent that we can share with others, even if it’s not financial. That’s often the first thing we think of, but it’s not the only thing needed.

On the beach that day, all some people had to contribute was arms and legs. It was more than enough.

Finally, they worked together.

I don’t know how many people it takes to make a chain to cover 100 yards, but I know that five people wasn’t enough. Neither was 15. Some reports say it was more than 80 people who linked arms and stood firm and passed the struggling swimmers down the line until they, too, were on solid ground.

Few people can change the world alone. I’m sure there are some who do and who have, but the most effective change comes when people work together. Following the crowd doesn’t always have to be a bad thing.

Ten people are alive because these four principles were put into action, and more than those ten people have a renewed sense of the human capability for goodness.

So, can you change the world?

I absolutely believe we can.

3 words that would guarantee my vote

We were watching the first NASCAR race of the season, and when it ended, we switched over to the latest GOP debate, our first time tuning in to any debate in this wild election season.

Until then I’d read articles and status updates, watched parodies, and heard about the ridiculous behaviors of the candidates and their claims. Seeing it first-hand was something else. The shouting, the interrupting, the slinging of insults. Debates are not exactly civil forms of discourse.

I should disclose here that I have no freaking clue who I am voting for, nor do I consider myself a Republican or Democrat. So, the choices are pretty much wide open for me, though I can say with near-certainty that I will not vote for Donald Trump.

I might reconsider, though, if he said three little words.

Michael Browning via Unsplash

Michael Browning via Unsplash

***

The election process is built on promises. Plans for change. Reform. Dreams of better than what we have now. No matter who you align with, your candidate has ideas for how he or she would do things if elected.

And all of them are lying to some extent, whether they intend to or not.

I’ve never run for any kind of office, so maybe the following illustrations are weak, but I have made promises to myself that I haven’t kept.

Promises like, “Our marriage will be different.” Marriage is hard work. Spouses fight. Divorce is a real possibility. All the things people told me before I was married, I dismissed because I thought I knew better. I imagined something different but I didn’t have all the information. I had no idea what it would be like to join my life with someone else’s and to work through the rough patches.

Promises like, “I won’t be that kind of parent.” Isn’t it amazing how much we know about parenting before we have kids? The truth is, it doesn’t matter what kind of parent I think I’m going to be because each child is unique. I can’t possibly predict my parenting skills before I meet the objects of those skills.

I don’t have any data to back up this claim, but human nature being what it is makes me think that every president has broken a promise of some kind. What was pledged during a campaign was altered once in office.

It’s foolish, really, to expect a person to keep all the promises they make about the next four years because none of us really knows what the future holds. Did George W. Bush expect to be president in a post-9/11 world that brought terrorism to our country and security changes none of us could have imagined ever needing?

Could John F. Kennedy have predicted his death before his term had ended? Did Lincoln anticipate a brutal civil war? Did Hoover know he’d lead the country during a depression? Were FDR’s promises based on the country’s involvement in a world war?

These are all examples of disaster and tragedy, sure, but aren’t those the things that sidetrack our dreams? That challenge our promises?

***

So, what are the words I want to hear from a candidate?

“I don’t know.”

Those three words say so much. They leave room for learning, for teamwork. They are a humble admission of weakness. (My husband says they also would be political suicide.)

Frankly, I’m tired of know-it-alls. Tired of overpromising and underdelivering. I’m suspicious of big plans and lofty dreams. Maybe that means I’m a cynic or a pessimist. Or a realist. I want to believe that the next president will do good, but I’m also aware that he or she is just a human, like me, with just a few more qualifications for national leadership.

I want to hear why a person is qualified for the job, what drives them to campaign for a position that will undoubtedly age them and wear on their families.

And it’s not that I don’t want to hear anything about a candidate’s dreams for the nation; it’s just that I don’t want them to sound like guarantees. I’m okay with a leader who says, “I’m not sure what I’d do in that situation, but I know whose advice I would ask, what factors I might consider.”

Maybe I’m the one dreaming now. I get that there’s a playbook to follow in this game, and no political strategist would advise a candidate to say these words.

But I know if I heard them, I’d be much more likely to vote for that candidate. They would at least have my attention for something other than circus antics.

***

I know how hard it is for me to say, “I don’t know” in my own life. I want to have answers. I don’t want to admit there are things I don’t know.

So, maybe the best I can hope for is to start with myself. To admit my inadequacies, my areas of weakness, the things I don’t know.

And maybe that will never change a nation, but it will change me.

Good thing I’m never planning to run for president.