Beauty on the Backroads

Stories of grace for life's unexpected turns

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Review: A story for those who love Ireland

A Dance in Donegal is a sweet romance that made me long for a trip to Ireland. The story started a little slower than I usually like as Moira adjusted to her new life in Ballymann but by the middle I was invested in the characters and their converging paths. I wanted to see how the relationship between her and Sean would progress. I also enjoyed the use of Gaelic language and the glossary that was included in the back of the book for proper pronunciation and meaning. I look forward to reading more Irish stories from this author.

A guide for the wanderers

This book is part history, part guidebook for the spiritual life, and Lisa Deam has combined the two in a way that is accessible for even the nominal spiritual seeker. Following the journeys of three medieval saints who pilgrimaged to Jerusalem, Deam applies their experiences to those of the modern pilgrim, even ones who have not left their homes and families for a trip to the Holy Land. We modern saints have much to learn from our spiritual ancestors, and Deam presents the historical journeys in an accessible way for those of us who might be new to the idea of pilgrimage, or the study of saints. 

As I read, I began thinking of Jerusalem in a new way, especially as it appears in the Bible–not as simply an actual physical place but as a metaphor of the end goal of the Christian life. A place in the spiritual kingdom, the dwelling place of God at the end of all things.

Deam reminds us that we do not have to go on an epic journey of faith like these pilgrims did in order to experience spiritual renewal: “A true pilgrim travels nowhere more distant than the landscape of her own faith.”

3,000 Miles to Jesus: Pilgrimage as a Way of Life for Spiritual Seekers is a helpful tool in the hands of those who might be wandering in their faith or feeling a bit lost on their journey.

I received an advance copy of the book from the publisher. Review reflects my honest opinion.

Burns Night, quarantines, and introducing our kids to a classic movie: A January round-up

We’re on our second snow day in a row today, and it’s been snowing for three days, so I’m convinced we now live in a snow globe. At the beginning of the year (was that only a month ago?) I decided to start keeping track of the things our family was doing, watching, eating and reading each month and at the end of the month I would publish the round-up. Some of it is super ordinary, but it’s helping me appreciate our days more. You might find some of it interesting, you might not, and that’s okay. This is one of those things I’m doing for me. As I did with a post late last year, I’ve broken it out with headings so if you’re only interested in the books we’ve read, for example, you can skip to that section and ignore all the shows we watch.

What we watched/are watching

Movies

We’re gradually working our way through the Marvel Universe. This month we checked these movies off the list:

  • Ant-Man. I love Paul Rudd!
  • Avengers: Civil War. It’s SO intense.
  • Doctor Strange. The first time I ever watched this, I was SO confused and did not really like it. The second time was better, but it’s still a strange (ha ha!) movie.
  • Guardians of the Galaxy 2. Baby Groot! Also I find myself now saying, “And I didn’t say ‘frickin'” far more than is probably healthy.

We were supposed to watch the first Spiderman movie but we had to get it from the library and they closed for COVID and then snow, so we decided to introduce the kids to Napoleon Dynamite. They laughed at the physical comedy parts, but I’m not sure they loved it as much as I always have.

TV/Streaming Series

Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego? We started the third season of the animated version on Netflix.

Grantchester, season 4 on Amazon Prime. This includes a significant turning point for Sidney Chambers, which made me sad. I once described this show to a friend as “hot vicar solves mysteries” and I stand by that description still.

The Crown, season 4 on Netflix. Diana deserved better! Also, this part of the story is traumatic for me because I know how it ends. Is this what it’s like to watch fictional creations of history you’ve lived through?

Bridgerton, on Netflix. Brilliant. There are subtle creative touches like the orchestra playing contemporary songs at the balls and in the background of scenes. I will admit to having never watched a series by Shonda Rhimes before. Is she a genius? Yes. I watched all the episodes and I might watch them again while waiting for the first book to be available from the library.

Mr. Mayor, the new NBC comedy starring Ted Danson. Can we just be honest and say that Ted Danson has only gotten better with age?

Schitt’s Creek. Phil and I are still working our way through the series, mostly because we don’t want it to end. We just finished season 5 and are a few episodes in to season 6, the final season. Does it have to end?

The Presidential Inauguration. Because of my quarantine (see the “What We Did” section) I was able to watch it live all day with Phil.

Daily press briefings. Phil has a little crush on the new White House press secretary, so he tunes in regularly but also we just appreciate the wealth of information being disseminated from the administration.

What we ate

Our son picks the meal on Saturdays and helps make it. One meal in his rotation is pork chops. He decided he didn’t want to make an onion sauce this time around, so we did caramelized onions. I followed the recipe in Mark Bittman’s How to Cook Everything cookbook (a MUST for every kitchen. It’s comprehensive and accessible) and I fell in love with my own cooking for the first time in a long time. (Usually I consider myself adequate.)

Homemade chicken soup. While we waited for Phil’s COVID test results (again, see the next section), I made chicken soup for dinner. Because I believe in science and medicine but I also think food contributes to healing. Did I pull the frozen bone broth out of the freezer to make the soup? Yes. Did I drink all the broth that was left in the soup pot? Also, yes.

After I learned I would be quarantining, I searched the Internet for foods that boost your immune system, intending to give my body a head start, in case it would need to fight the virus. I made a soup with a variety of vegetables, bone broth, and miso paste. It was delicious, and it makes me feel like I’m doing something to help my body.

I called it “immunity soup”

During the inauguration, Phil and I ate summer rolls, sushi and samosas, a nod to the multicultural heritage of our new vice president. (And because it’s good food and we wanted something sort of special for our quarantine date.) For dinner, we researched some of the favorite foods of our new president and vice president. Kamala Harris likes seafood gumbo, and Phil got a cookbook for Christmas that celebrates black cooks, so we picked a gumbo recipe from there that has meaning to the African-American community. Marcus Samuelsson, the cookbook’s author, honored New Orleans chef Leah Chase, who ran a restaurant in New Orleans during the Civil Rights era (the restaurant still exists) and served everybody, regardless of race. Chase’s gumbo recipe is what we ate, and it was GOOD.

Leah Chase’s seafood gumbo

We picked up some of Joe Biden’s favorite ice cream, a brand called Jeni’s, made in Ohio. We tried three different flavors:

Peanut butter almond brittle, salted peanut butter with chocolate flecks (the President’s favorite), bramble berry crisp

January 25th is Scottish poet Robert Burns’ birthday, and because the pandemic is feeling like it will never end, I decided to do something sort of crazy that also made me happy. I planned a sort of Burns’ Night Dinner for the occasion. Here’s what was on the menu:

  • Cock-a-leekie soup (chicken and leeks with barley and plums).
  • Scotch eggs (soft-boiled eggs wrapped in sausage and deep fried).
  • Selkirk Bannock (a yeast bread made with raisins; sort of scone-like). I was proudest of this because I don’t always do well with yeast breads.
  • Orange Cranachan for dessert (a layered pudding dessert with toasted oatmeal).
  • I also drank some Scotch whisky that tasted like I was licking the hills of Scotland.
Selkirk bannock
Orange cranachan (it’s typically made with raspberries but we used what we had)

Phil plans and executes the meal on Wednesdays, so one night we had a plant-based burger taste test. Phil cooked two kinds of plant-based burgers–Impossible Burgers and Beyond Burgers–then gave each of us half of each kind to decide which one we liked better. We did not tell the kids, at first, that they were plant-based protein. Three of us liked the Beyond Burger better; one preferred the Impossible Burger. And the biggest surprise of all was that our son, who is a meat-atarian, liked the Beyond Burger so much that he added it to his Saturday menu rotation.

We’re trying to eat local takeout once a month, so for January we went to Noodle King for pho and egg rolls. There was a time, pre-pandemic, that we ate at Noodle King once a month. The kids are convinced this is what kept us so healthy.

My bowl of chicken pho from Noodle King

What we did

Our son figured out how to play his Switch online with friends–one from school and one who lives on the other side of the country, and I couldn’t love this more. He now hosts regular online meetings with his friends to play video games together. He’s being social.

We left our church. There’s a lot I could say about this, but the decision has taken up a lot of emotional and mental space in my head, so I’m just going to leave it at that for now.

We took the Christmas decorations down and put them away for the year. I miss the tree’s presence in the living room, but I have some evergreen/pine candles to re-create the scent.

I played Minecraft with my children. A highlight: My son saying, “I’m going to revive Izzy because she’s more helpful.” I also played an old-school Nintendo game with my son.

Phil got a COVID test and we isolated at home for a day (or two). Then I quarantined for a week. These were anxiety-induced days, but we made it through without either of us testing positive or developing symptoms.

On two consecutive nights, I watched the International Space Station pass overhead from our backyard.

I finished a puzzle of Cinque Terre, Italy. Sometime last year, Phil and I watched a travel documentary about Cinque Terre. When I saw the puzzle, I had to have it. Now, I’m dreaming of the Italian coast.

Cinque Terre, Italy is now on my must-see travel list

I unintentionally cleaned the area around my desk while searching for some documents I needed to fill out paperwork. 

Isabelle and I attended a Zoom meeting live from Dadaab, the largest refugee camp in Kenya. The meeting was hosted by the co-author of a book we read this month–a man local to Lancaster now who grew up in the refugee camp. It was heart-opening.

The kids went to a new dentist. It was an overall positive experience but the practice’s policies are different than our previous dentist and it was a bit jarring at first. (The kids went back to the cleaning with the hygienist. I waited in the car with a pager.) Both have healthy teeth, though!

What we read/are reading

Most of what I list here will be what I read, but I’ll include some from the rest of the family as I can.

Clanlands: Whisky, Warfare and a Scottish Adventure Like No Other by Sam Heughan and Graham McTavish. If you’re among those who are in Droughtlander (the time between release of Outlander TV series seasons and/or books) right now, this is a suitable substitute. There is A LOT of history in this book, but it actually just makes me curious to know more. If you’re familiar with these two actors as personalities, the book will be that much better for you.

I started reading Truman by David McCullough as part of my It Was Always Burning reading challenge. It is slow going, but mostly because it’s a thousand pages long. The politics section I’m in right now feels like a slog.

3,000 Miles to Jesus: Pilgrimage as a Way of Life for Spiritual Seekers by Lisa Deam. Full review on this in a separate blog post. I met Lisa at a writing retreat several years ago, and I was pleased to be able to read her book in advance of its release.

Roll of Thunder, Hear My Cry. My daughter and I both finished this as part of our school reading. I don’t remember if I ever read it as a student. Her conclusion? It’s such a good book. I agree, although sometimes the vast descriptions are difficult for students to sift through to find the main actions. Part of my job was to help with that.

When Stars are Scattered by Victoria Jamieson and Omar Mohamed. Omar lives and works locally in my city. I’ve met him and heard his story through one of the refugee resettlement organizations. I’ve had his book for months and wanted to read it before he hosted a Zoom meeting from the Kenyan refugee camp where he once lived. (See previous section, “What We Did.”)

Selected poems by Robert Burns. This while drinking the peaty Scotch.

Monster by Walter Dean Myers. Another one for school. I’m only a few “chapters” into it. I read along so I can better help my students. (It’s not a huge sacrifice to me.) Myers is quickly become a go-to author for a quick but meaningful read.

Raisins and Almonds by Kerry Greenwood. Back to the Phryne Fisher mysteries.

The next two books deal with mental health issues and suicide, so if those topics are triggering for you, please feel free to skip.

I started All The Bright Places by Jennifer Niven for a book club I’m in. I’ve read the first quarter of the book, as needed for book club. It was really hard to stop but I don’t want to read ahead and accidentally spoil for someone else!

The Midnight Library by Matt Haig. A few weeks ago, I checked this out of the library and then had to return it because it was on hold and I couldn’t renew it. Second time’s a charm! Unforgettable. I finished it in a day.

Our son likes the Stick Dog books by Tom Watson and he and I are reading one together at night. (There are also Stick Cat books, which is where he got his start.) These are quirky, humorous stories about a band of dogs who get into a little bit of trouble now and then.

If you want to keep up with my reading in real-time, you can follow me on Instagram, where I post a picture and short review every time I finish a book, or find me on Goodreads.

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Well, there’s a bit of what we’ve been up to. You can check in towards the end of each month for another riveting update of our lives in media, food, activities and books.

Six years later, I still can’t forget

Six years ago, Phil and I had an opportunity, one I couldn’t get out of my head. Our church was planning a trip to Kenya, to support and  encourage a couple who served there at a school. It was an impossible dream, in my mind, that I would see Africa. Our young family was barely making ends meet. My passport had long expired. There were so many steps, so many pieces that had to fall into place for this to happen. The deposit for both of us was due before Christmas, and in the lean years, we had no extra money for such things. I trusted somehow that things would work out, and in what I consider a truly miraculous way, I got a freelance job that paid almost exactly what we needed for the deposit.

That’s how I remember it, anyway. 

I was compelled by a force I could not explain to take this trip, and I couldn’t do it with my own resources.

As our team raised funds for the trip, some people we sought out for support thought we were asking them to fund our vacation. Our trip did include a safari and a hike to the top of a volcano, but the bulk of our time was spent working at the school where our friends worked.

And on one unforgettable day, we traveled to a refugee camp to attend church. While I consider the entire trip life-changing, it was that day in particular that changed my life in real and tangible ways.

Before that day, I’d barely heard about refugees. I didn’t understand the global crisis or know anything about what I could do about it. I’d certainly never met a refugee. (At least not that I knew of.) But that day, I watched children stuff hard-boiled eggs into their mouths, followed by a banana–a meal they could count on. I stood in a circle of children who reached for the free T-shirts we were distributing, overwhelmed by the need and surprised by the desperation. I had thought the children would receive the gifts with patience and gratitude. Instead, they grasped for what we had to give, some even telling us they needed a second one for their brother who was at home. (Which may or may not have been true.)

I stood in a church service listening to the voices around me sing about God’s faithfulness and wondered why I could not find my own voice. I peed in a hole in the ground. I walked through a dry riverbed to the homes of some refugee women who had walked miles to be at church that morning. I stood in their homes and floundered for words as they asked me–ME, of little faith–to pray for them. I found words, but they stuck in my throat and I hated the way they sounded as I voiced them.

Later, I cried unstoppable tears because I couldn’t help them. I didn’t have money to buy the purses they were selling. I was so overwhelmed by what I saw and what I felt that I did not learn a single name of the women I had met. I took not one photo while I was there.

Still, the images are burned in my mind.

—

This is not the first time I have told this story on the blog, so why am I telling it again?

First, I tell it again to myself so I can remember.

When I came home from Kenya in 2015, my worldview was shaken. I was no longer unaware of the needs in the world. I had seen them firsthand.

But what could I do?

Part of me wanted to save all my money and fly back to Kenya. The culture shock upon our return to the States was unexpected. I was tempted to yell at shoppers at Costco who didn’t walk their carts back to the corral because it was raining. I was aware of just how MUCH stuff we had. I wanted to give everything away, to live more simply.

Was that really going to help?

Then, I connected with a refugee resettlement agency in our city and for the next couple of years, I helped welcome refugees to our community. I sat with them in classes and tried to explain things they would need to know–like how to budget their money and how to practice good hygiene. I drove refugees to the grocery store and to medical appointments.

It was so far outside of my comfort zone but exactly what I needed to do at the time. Those years of volunteer service are some of my happiest memories of our time in Lancaster, and I still don’t feel like I was doing enough to help.

In 2018, about the same time that the U.S government was scaling back its refugee admission allowances because of a xenophobic administration, I got a part-time job, working at a school. My availability to volunteer with refugees dwindled and fewer refugees were resettled. At a time when refugees needed my advocacy the most, I spoke for them less and less. I had not forgotten them, but I lost hope that there was anything I could do for them when the government of my country was so opposed to their very existence.

Working in a school, though, is one of the results of my time in Kenya and volunteering with refugees. I would not have thought myself capable of such a step if I hadn’t had those experiences. And because of those experiences, I’ve had the opportunity to work with children of immigrants, students learning English for the first time, homeless students, and students who just need someone to believe in them.

I count this one of the many returns on the investment made in my trip to Kenya.

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Again, though, none of this is new information to be shared. If you’re still with me and haven’t tuned out yet, please stay with me.

A few months ago, I bought a book written by a former refugee, Omar Mohamed, a man who now lives and works in Lancaster and who has started an organization to help refugee students in his former camp. My daughter and I both read the book in January, and on Saturday, we joined a Zoom meeting live from the Dadaad Refugee Camp, the largest refugee camp in Kenya. This camp is situated on the other side of the country from where I was in Kenya, near the border with Somalia. I could not pass up the chance to see it with my own eyes and hear from students who are striving to get an education in conditions we would not tolerate for a single second for our own children.

I think most of us can agree that educating our children in the last year has been difficult, to say the least. Teachers have had to make accommodations like never before. As someone who sees every day what they’re doing, I can say with confidence, they’re doing an amazing job. The challenges facing educators and students during a pandemic have required vast amounts of creativity.

They are like nothing, however, compared to the challenges facing educators and students in refugee camps.

Let me pause here and say that I do not wish to overlook the sacrifices educators here in the States have made in order to teach this year. I love my co-workers and see the stress they carry and I wish things were different. What I saw from Dadaab, though, makes me grateful for what we have here and compels me to find a way to assist.

We heard from real students who gathered at their high schools for an extra FIVE HOURS on a Saturday, just so they could tell us firsthand what the challenges are that they face. Usually on Saturdays, their schooling ends at noon. When they spoke with us, it was edging toward evening. They told us how in one school the classroom is 5 meters by 4 meters, walled on four sides, and hosts 86 students every school day in a room designed for 30. These 86 students–64 boys and 22 girls–create a lot of noise and heat and body odor because of the heat and lack of air circulation. These students WANT to be at school. They WANT to learn. And in order to continue with their education, they must compete with students from the entire country of Kenya (most of whom have better resources) in order to secure scholarships to Canada. There are no computers in the classroom, and they only have textbooks when there are extras the government can give them. Many of them do not go home for lunch because within the hour they are allotted, they cannot walk to the village and back in time. Water lines in the village are only open twice a day for an hour–from 7-8 a.m. and 3-4 p.m. If a student waits in these lines, he or she might be late for school (or have to leave early).

Let’s sit with this for a moment. These students spoke to us clearly and articulately in English, which is not their first language. They are desperate to continue their education. They are learning in spite of these conditions. Lack of food and water, lack of books and other learning resources.

But wait. There is more.

We also heard from a Somali girl. (Many of the refugees in Dadaab are Somali.) Education for girls is especially difficult because families are eager to marry their daughters to a man who can provide for them all, even if he is uneducated. Early marriage is a common practice in these cultures. Girls want to learn, too, but they are grossly outnumbered. For every 8 boys who receive a scholarship to further their education, 1 girl receives a scholarship. Add to that the need for basic hygiene products for girls, who often miss school while they are menstruating, because they do not have access to sanitary pads. (Ladies, can you imagine having to miss work or school for one week every month because you are having your period?)

This is one initiative Refugee Strong is taking on for 2021.

Students from the next school told us that four students share one desk (meant for two students). There are 100 desks and 400 students in the school. Because there are not enough textbooks for everyone, students must rely on the notes the teacher writes on the board. They must study before the sun sets because they do not always have enough oil to burn to provide light after dark. (There is little to no electricity in the camp.) And those 400 students? They share two latrines, which are in danger of collapsing during the rainy season.

There are no nurses or school counselors at the schools. Some students sleep in a “dorm” at the school because they are serious about their studies in the last year of schooling and at their “home” in the villages of the refugee camp, there is no space to study. To secure a scholarship to Canada, students must earn at least a B+. Earning a B or a B- does not cut it.

Because of COVID-19, food distribution at the camp happens every two months. It used to happen every 15 days. So, every two months, families are given their share of the food rations: maize, beans, oil and rice. And it must last them TWO MONTHS. (Confession: I have complained about the pandemic reducing my trips to the grocery store. We still go once a week.)

In some places, a family of 10 (a mother and 9 children) share a two “bedroom” dwelling that is four meters square.

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If you’re like me, reading all of this makes you feel overwhelmed. And probably a little bit helpless. Maybe you’re thinking things like: 

“I can’t fix this.” 

“This problem is too big to solve.” 

“What can I do?”

Omar, the founder of Refugee Strong, addressed this.

“The need is too much,” he said, “but we help what we can.”

This has been a loose mantra of mine since coming back from Kenya. What can I do? Where can I help? Sometimes it doesn’t feel like much.

But I’m excited about the mission of Refugee Strong because Omar hand delivers to the students in Dadaab Refugee Camp. He is aware of the corruption and of organizations who come and make big promises without delivering. When questioned by one of the students about what he was going to do to help them, he said, “We cannot promise anything, but we deliver to you whatever we have.”

This is a man who spent 15 years of his life living in a refugee camp, caring for his brother, searching for his mother. He could have taken his good fortune at being resettled in the United States and never looked back. But he not only looks back at Dadaab, he offers us a way to share in the way forward for these students.

If you want to know more about what it’s like to live in a refugee camp, get a copy of Omar’s book: When Stars are Scattered. It’s a graphic novel, and it’s a beautiful way to tell his story. (If you’d rather read a traditional non-fiction book, I recommend City of Thorns: Nine Lives in the World’s Largest Refugee Camp by Ben Rawlence. The subtitle is outdated, though. Dadaab is no longer the world’s largest refugee camp.)

You can find Refugee Strong at www.refugeestrong.org and on Facebook and Instagram for updates and ways to help.

These words are me doing what I can right now. What can you do?

New year, new reading challenge

So, it’s 2021. January. A time for new beginnings. This year, especially, we hope for new beginnings. Or at least, I do. Toward the end of last year, my reading life faltered. There was just TOO MUCH going on in my head and the world and I was trying to read non-fiction and it wasn’t working for me. I abandoned (temporarily) a book I really wanted to read and binged a bunch of fiction. Mostly cozy mysteries and some YA books just to feed my brain some fantasy worlds. 

Photo by 2Photo Pots on Unsplash

By the time 2020 was over, I had blown past my Goodreads challenge goal, and I had a new idea for a way to challenge myself with my reading for 2021.

I’m here to tell you about it.

First, do you set a goal for number of books to read in a year? If so, what determines that number? I usually look at the number of books I read the previous year and set something similar or a little higher. Last year, I wanted to read 50 books. I set the number low because I aimed to read more non-fiction. I ended up reading 68 books with much more fiction than originally planned because well, pandemic.

This year, I set the goal at 70. I know I can make this goal no matter if I’m reading fiction or non-fiction, especially if I choose books more often than social media. (Anyone else find themselves scrolling when they could be reading?)

Late in the year, while working out, I was listening to an “all 90s” station online and “We Didn’t Start the Fire” by Billy Joel played. I’ve always been a fan of Billy Joel, and despite what some people say about its merits, I like the song. It’s catchy and chock full of historical references. Most of which I don’t understand. I read that Billy Joel wrote this song when he turned 40, including major historical events from his life up to that point. I found that interesting. I wondered what events I would include if I was going to write a song about my first 40 years of life. (This is something I’m still pondering. Maybe it won’t be a song, but a list or a poem.)

I realized as I listened that not only did I not know to what the lyrics were referring, I didn’t know much about the time periods in general. I looked up the lyrics. There’s even a Wikipedia page that explains some of the historical references. I decided that in 2021, I would read some books about the events listed in “We Didn’t Start the Fire.”

Because, as I’m learning, the problems that are revealing themselves in the United States today did not happen overnight. As Joel says in the song, the fire “was always burning since the world’s been turning.” I have such a limited view of history, even American history, and I want to change that.

To keep the list manageable, I picked one topic from each set of stanzas in the song before a chorus for a total of nine books, some fiction, most non-fiction.

Here’s my reading plan:

  •  Truman by David McCullough. “Harry Truman” is literally the first person mentioned in the song. I know nothing about him or his presidency. Also, I’ve never read a book by McCullough, even though he’s a favorite author of my husband.
  • The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger. I don’t remember ever reading this. If I did, I don’t remember anything about it. I find that any classics I had to read in school, I don’t remember and I probably did not appreciate. So, it’s good to re-read them as an adult.
  • Campy: The Two Lives of Roy Campanella by Neil Lanctot. This is about a baseball player, a person of color who had a notable career in the major league and was later in a car accident that paralyzed him.
  • Peyton Place by Grace Metalious. I’ve never even heard of this controversial piece of fiction.
  • A Mighty Long Way: My Journey to Justice at Little Rock Central High School by Carlotta Walls. Walls was one of the “Little Rock Nine” and she wrote about her experience integrating the high school in Little Rock. 
  • A Brotherhood of Spies: The U-2 and the CIA’s Secret War by Monte Reel. This is the “U-2” in the song, not the Irish rock band.
  • Stranger in a Strange Land by Robert Heinlein. Another piece of fiction.
  • Shoot for the Moon: The Space Race and The Extraordinary Voyage of Apollo 11 by James Donovan. Maybe this is self-explanatory? I’ve watched a lot of movies about the space race of the 1950s and 60s, but I can’t recall reading anything about it.
  • How to Survive a Plague: The Inside Story of How Citizens and Science Tamed AIDS by David France.

I added all of these books to my “want-to-read” list on Goodreads, and they are all available from my local library (and we own Truman), so I’m not planning to spend any money on this reading challenge. I invite you to join in on all or part of it. I can’t promise that this will be a one-book-every-month thing because have you seen the size of Truman? Nor are these the only books I will read this year. In fact, I haven’t started the challenge yet because I have two non-fiction books I’m working through right now. (I’ll tell you about those at a later time.)

One thing I’ve realized is that my picks from the song’s list of historical events and people is still very much centered on U.S. history. I believe it’s important to know about the events that formed our country, AND I believe it’s important to understand what was happening around the world. Maybe my next challenge will be to pick books and topics related to international events mentioned in the song!

I’m not sure I blogged about books at all last year. I did send a few newsletters about reading to a small group of people. I’m still undecided about whether I will continue that, but I will update you occasionally on this challenge here. And if you decide to read one or more of these books, I’d love to hear about it! You can comment on the blog or send me an email or a message on Facebook or Instagram.

Happy 2021 reading, friends! Ultimately, read what you like and love and what interests you because time is too valuable to spend on reading things you hate.

How we spent our Christmas vacation

Last year, I occasionally blogged about how we were spending our socially distant pandemic days as a way to remember the time and how we spent it. I decided to do the same thing for our Christmas vacation because Phil took the week off of work and for the first time since moving to Pennsylvania, we didn’t go home at all for Christmas or New Year’s.

I’ve broken it down into categories to make it easier for you to follow along, and I didn’t record everything (because no one needs to know how long the kids played video games or how many times I washed dishes).

Movies we watched

On Christmas Eve, we kicked off our break with a family tradition, White Christmas, and to make it more interesting for our son who claimed he would be bored, we tracked all the instances of smoking in the movie (because the movie’s rating mentions smoking). Spoiler alert: it’s not a few times.

Egg nog and “White Christmas” is a tradition

Earlier that same day, I watched While You Were Sleeping, which I consider another must-watch of the holiday season.

On Christmas Day, after presents and video calls, we watched Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker. Phil and Corban had seen this in theaters last Christmas (was it ONLY last year??) but Isabelle and I hadn’t seen it yet. Our work here is done.

In keeping with our Saturday night tradition, we watched another Marvel movie: The Avengers: Age of Ultron. We are slowly working our way through the Marvel universe in order, and man, did I forget how weird this one is.

Tuesday night, we watched Soul, the new Disney/Pixar movie, and friends, this is the movie we needed for 2020.

New Year’s Eve was our movie marathon day. Each member of the family got to pick a movie to watch. Isabelle chose Hamilton, which took up our entire morning and for that we are not sorry. Phil chose Eddie the Eagle about a British ski jumper in 1988 Calgary Olympics. It’s a feel-good story (and yes we are enjoying our Disney Plus membership gifted to us by a family member). I chose Jurassic Park (the original classic one) and Corban chose Home Alone 2. (We watched Home Alone the weekend before our break started.) That took us until 11 p.m.

During the week, Phil and I finished Series 11 of Doctor Who, which we had checked out of the library.

Food We Ate

If you know us, you know that food is a big deal, and we were not leaving our week-at-home eating to chance. We carefully planned out our dinner meals and extra treats so that we could stock up at the store and not have to think about what we were having every day. (We use a Google doc to keep ourselves organized. Nerd alert!)

For Christmas Eve, we wanted something that felt like comfort food, so we made chicken pot pie (or chicken pie as it’s known in Lancaster; the kind that’s made with a pie crust, not with pasta in a pot; food names are weird). We ate cookies our neighbor dropped off and drank eggnog with the movie, which is part of the White Christmas watching tradition.

Breakfast on Christmas morning was cinnamon rolls from a can (we have not tried homemade yet because of time but think we may have to), tropical fruit, sausages and hot drinks.

Chef Phil breaking down the meat

We grazed on a variety of meats, cheeses, olives and crackers for lunch while dinner cooked in the oven. For years, Phil has wanted to make porchetta, a recipe he saw in a Michael Symon cookbook. It requires a fresh ham, which he ordered from a local butcher, and it was bigger than we expected. Still, we pressed on with the prep and cooking, and it was delicious! With the porchetta we had cornbread stuffing (a new recipe we tried from Bon Appetit magazine) and a shaved Brussels sprouts salad (another Chef Symon recipe) and sourdough bread (not homemade) with Irish butter. I drank a beer. Phil had whisky. Our dessert was Jello poke cake.

The full meal, minus dessert

On Saturdays, our son chooses the menu from a rotation of meals he has approved. This week it was a mac and cheese casserole that usually contains hot dogs, but we convinced him to include some of the leftover porchetta meat. Mixed frozen vegetables on the side.

Sunday was our hike day (more on that later) and one of the culinary adventures we wanted to have during our Christmas break was MREs. Phil ordered a random bundle of them online and we took them on our hike. The promise of a hot meal sustained us as we hiked in the sub-30-degree temps, but the air temperature may have been too cold for the heating chemical to work properly. Still, we had a picnic at an outcropping next to a lake in December–a fun memory! Some of the MRE contents included: teriyaki beef sticks (which come from nearby Lebanon, PA), bread with cheese sauce, trail mix, crackers with chocolate peanut butter sauce, a chocolate toaster pastry, chocolate pudding, southwestern chicken burrito bowl, beef ravioli, tortellini with tomato sauce, southwestern beef and beans.

For dinner, we had pierogis (from frozen), chicken tenders (from frozen) and raw broccoli (must have a vegetable!).

On Monday for lunch, Phil made grilled cheese sandwiches out of the sourdough and leftover porchetta, and this was my first grilled cheese that used mayonnaise instead of butter on the outside of the sandwich. It was not a mistake!

Dinner was an assortment of canned soups of the Campbell’s and Progresso varieties. (Part of our intention for food was to do things we don’t normally do, and canned soups is not a regular part of our diet.)

Tuesday and Wednesday featured a lot of local takeout.

Fruit, granola, coconut, peanut butter, frozen açaí puree–a refreshing combination

For lunch on Tuesday, we had açaí bowls from Oola Bowls, a stand at Central Market. We followed that up with salad. Tuesday was like a cleanse day for us except there were still a lot of cookies and other leftovers in the house.

On Wednesday, the boys wanted to get McRibs from McDonald’s and I avoid the golden arches as much as possible, so the girls ordered crepes from Rachel’s Creperie. (Son and I had crepes the week of Thanksgiving and daughter did not get to participate, so this was a double win for me.)

I’m pretty sure I could eat one of these every day.

After watching a taste-testing episode of Mexican food a few weeks ago, we were hungry for authentic Mexican food. We ordered from Cocina Mexicana (enchiladas verdes for me-yum! There were also tamales, and chile rellanos and nachos and chorizo fries.)

Can’t go wrong with tamales

New Year’s Eve was another feasting sort of day. We started with monkey bread for breakfast. Leftovers for lunch. For dinner, we had sweet and sour meatballs, crab rangoon dip, other chips and dips, veggies, Christmas cookies, more meat and cheese. I drank a beer long before midnight. The kids toasted with sparkling grape juice. Phil had Scotch. I was on to water by then.

Activities We Did

Besides watching movies and eating food, we did some other things during our break.

I put together a puzzle, with some help.

I did not finish the puzzle before Santa arrived.

We video called with family, multiple times.

Hi, family!

On Saturday, we spent most of the day cleaning and organizing the kitchen, the mud room and the mud room closet. I cannot tell you how amazing it feels to have these rooms functional and uncluttered. I even got rid of some coffee mugs and some pans we don’t use.

We caught a Pokemon on the trail.

Sunday was our hiking day. We went to Muddy Run Park in southern Lancaster County and took the Lakeside Trail, which was adverted as “rugged walking.” The sign was not wrong. When we started, the ground was still a bit frozen but as the day went on, it loosened up a bit. All of us were on the ground at one point or another during the hike. We were cold and tired and bruised a little by the time we got home, but the fresh air did us good.

We hike in winter so you don’t have to. Enjoy!

We returned to cleaning on Monday, this time an area of the living room where the kids keep their legos and various other toys and projects. This, too, took up a large part of our day, but it, too, is satisfying. We’re still waiting on a shelving unit we ordered to complete the project, but cleaning was a big checkmark on the to-do list.

Before cleaning I went to the library.

The backyard is the most impressive part of the display, but I did not get a picture of that.

That night, we drove around looking at Christmas lights. This house on Longfellow Drive in Lancaster is an annual favorite. They raise money for Make-A-Wish and this picture does not even do justice to the amount of lights and holiday cheer that are on and around this house.

Tuesday was Christmas cookie day. Isabelle and I made the sugar cookie dough for Grandma’s cookies and then tried our hands at twisty candy cane cookies. Both required a lot of time and effort but it was worth it in the end.

Fun and educational!

We played a game of Icons: Women Who Play to Win. Highly recommend this card game. We did some online shopping so the kids could spend their Christmas money/gift cards.

On Wednesday, I had to run to Target because we were nearly out of toilet paper and I needed some mailing supplies. I bought myself a 2021 planner because I’m feeling optimistic.

After lunch I helped Phil put his new seat cover in the truck. Isabelle and I frosted the sugar cookies. And I attended a webinar on social media use. I prepped cookies and packages for mailing.

No kittens were harmed in the playing of this game

Our post-dinner entertainment was two rounds of the Exploding Kittens card game, another Christmas gift. Another recommendation.

I walked into the Post Office like freaking Santa Claus

Isabelle and I braved the post office on the morning of New Year’s Eve and it actually went better than expected. We were in and out in less than 10 minutes. I talked to one of my grandmas on the phone. In the afternoon, I went to visit a friend who is recovering from surgery. (We wore masks the whole time and stayed six feet apart.)

Books We Read

And what would a vacation be without reading? No vacation at all for our little family unit.

Corban and I finished The Tale of Despereaux on Christmas Eve Eve. I loved every bit of it. I finished the eighth Phryne Fisher mystery, Urn Burial, a few days after Christmas and started reading Clanlands: Whisky, Warfare and a Scottish Adventure Like No Other. Phil got two books for Christmas and he’s alternating between them: Birding at the Bridge, which talks about birds at the Brooklyn Bridge, two of his favorite things; and The Rise: Black Cooks and the Soul of American Food, a cookbook. He reads some cookbooks like actual books and I admire him for that. Isabelle plowed through a bunch of books in the I,Q series.

Additionally, there was the usual bits of housework, some resting and napping, some fighting and irritation between people, dishes and laundry and lots of video game playing because the boy child got a new gaming system for birthday/Christmas from everyone.

As with Thanksgiving, it may not have been the holiday we wanted, but it turned out just fine.

And now back to our regularly scheduled schedules. Happy New Year!

The things that helped me

It’s easy on January 1 to want to put the past behind us (especially when the past is a year like 2020), but as I was reminded by Sarah Bessey (a favorite writer of mine), there were things that helped us get through 2020 that I want to carry into 2021. She shared her list via email newsletter. (If you want a copy, I can forward it to you and then you can sign up for her monthly words! Or click the link to sign up.)

Here are a few things that helped me:

  • My Peak Challenge. I joined this program last year when it started in February before I knew how much I would need the structure and accountability for my health and fitness journey. The program includes monthly workouts and meal plans (the latter of which I followed very loosely because it’s set up for one person with lots of leftovers throughout the week and I cook for a family of four). I bought a tiny bit of equipment (bands, running shoes) and could do all the workouts or modifications at home. This is a plus for me because I hate going to the gym. I also connected online with Peakers (what we call ourselves) all over the globe. The program also raises money for charity. It’s a win-win-win for me and I’m back for a second year. (I get no compensation or reward for telling you about MPC. I just love it!)
This is a photo from April. The shirt has seen a lot of sweat since then.
  • A coffee subscription. I’m very particular about my coffee. (Read: snobby.) And I love supporting my local coffee shops. Every month bags of locally roasted coffee arrive at my house. I am always supplied with the coffee I love to drink and I’m supporting a local business with a regular purchase. (I happen to love Square One. If you find a local roaster you love, consider a coffee subscription!)
My preferred coffees are decaf because of my anxiety, but all the coffee from Square One is gooooood.
  • Sending mail. Forget the past few weeks of mail nightmares. Sending and receiving actual physical mail was a highlight of 2020. I’ve always loved this but I seldom take time for it. In 2021, I’m pledging to mail a letter to someone once a week. (If you’d like to be a recipient, send me a message with your address. I’ll put you on my list!) Postcards are an especially simple way to send a little note of care or encouragement. I was pleased to learn about these beauties from Ink & Willow. (I did receive a sample of these postcards to review. My opinion is independent of the freebie.) These hopeful messages you can color and send to others is a simple way to let people know you’re thinking of them. (I particularly love that they aren’t all Bible verses. Some are song lyrics; others are quotes from inspiring writers.)
  • Reading. (And the library). This will come as no surprise to anyone who knows me, but one aspect of reading I want to take into the new year is reading what I enjoy. Maybe that’s a no-brainer, but I still feel pressure sometimes to read what I think I should be reading. There is a place for that, and I do want my reading to educate me. But toward the end of the year, I just need to read for fun. I binged on cozy mysteries and my mood improved. Our family has always been prolific users of the public library, and 2020 was no different. I will continue to support them with my donations, late fees, and loans.
  • Supporting small businesses. This ties in to the coffee, I know, but it goes beyond that. I made a decision a while back to no longer buy books from Amazon because I have two really great independent bookstores nearby. I ordered all my books this year from independent bookstores. (If you don’t have one near you, check out IndieBound. You can shop the site just like you would the other site and your purchase will help independent bookstores around the country. I made one purchase like this.) Beyond bookstores, I tried to purchase Christmas gifts from local shops or online stores that are tied to small businesses. And we committed to eating takeout once a month from a local restaurant. All of these things make me feel good about how I’m spending my money and how I’m investing in the community.
  • Hiking. We did SO MUCH hiking this year, even when it was cold. And we plan to continue monthly hikes during the school year and, I hope, weekly hikes in the summer. Being outside refreshes me, and we have a plethora of parks and conservation areas within a short drive of our house, so there was no shortage of places to explore. We’ve barely even started. (You can find most of our hiking pictures on my Instagram.)
  • Puzzles and cross-stitch. Both hobbies help me focus when my brain is trying to lead me in a hundred different directions. I completed two cross-stitch projects this year and started a third. That’s more than in previous years combined. While my family isn’t as crazy about puzzles as I am, they do make room for my obsession at the dining room table and occasionally join my quest. Between me and Santa, we’re covered for puzzles this year.
One of the cross-stitch projects I completed and framed to give to a friend.
  • And like it or not, but video calls helped us stay connected with people. We could have done more than we did, but we participated in games with friends and family, toasted with friends on my birthday, and had family video chats that felt like being together. I don’t want to let distance or social distancing to be an excuse not to connect with people anymore.

There are probably more things, but this is a good list. What helped you get through 2020 that you want to carry into 2021?

What we’re missing

I was 20 the first time I missed Thanksgiving with my family. I was nearing the end of a semester of study abroad in England during my junior year of college. I waited my turn to call home from the phone box at the school. (This was the late 1990s, no cell phones widely available.) I cried hearing the voices of my family all gathered for a meal and board games. I could envision every little thing I was missing by being across the ocean from them.

I told them of the meal the British kitchen staff had prepared for us, complete with pumpkin pie made from canned pumpkin purchased in London at an astronomical price. Pumpkin pie, it turns out, is not a British food. Our host families had joined us and bravely tried the pumpkin pie we were all so fond of.  I wonder now if it was really the pumpkin pie we were fond of or just the taste of home. We dined in a hall of the 19th Century manor house that was our home and school that semester. Travel in Europe was at our fingertips. Our semester abroad was a dream come true.

And still we missed home.

Those of us who were American students had the advantage of all being together in our homesickness on that holiday. And while I remember the homesickness, I also remember the hospitality. American Thanksgiving is not something widely celebrated in other countries, yet the staff went out of their way to make us all feel like we weren’t missing out.

That is something I’ll never forget.

Photo by Element5 Digital on Unsplash

The next time Thanksgiving was missing something, my fiancé was in Iraq. He missed a lot of things during the year of his deployment but the holidays were the hardest. In our case, he missed them at the beginning of his deployment. I don’t know if that made the separation easier or harder. Either way, it was difficult.

Until these two experiences, I had not ever had to miss a holiday with my family, that I can remember. Sometimes I’d have to go in to work toward the end of Thanksgiving to help put out a newspaper for the next day, but I still got to have a meal with my family. 

After Phil and I were married, missing holidays became a regular part of our holiday tradition. We haven’t been home for Thanksgiving in 12 years. For a few years, Phil had to work on Thanksgiving, sometimes during the day, other times at the end of the day in preparation for Black Friday shoppers. Over the years, we’ve had family come visit us for Thanksgiving. We’ve celebrated with friends who invited us to their house. And we’ve been on our own. One glorious year, we made our own family–a blend of blood relatives and close friends who gathered at our house for the day.

This year, it’s back to the four of us, and while this is not a new situation for us, I understand that it might be new for some of you. Some of you are missing an in-person get-together with family. Some of you are missing travel. Some of you are going ahead with your plans, pandemic be damned.

I know what it feels like to miss your family on holidays. I know what it feels like to be separated from the people you love. I know what it feels like to be lonely when others are gathering with family and friends. One year, we left a Christmas Eve church service depressed and nearly in tears because the pews were filled with families, and we were missing ours. It was a year we weren’t able to go home in time for Christmas but would be traveling the day after. Because we’d always missed this particular service due to travel, most people were surprised to even see us there. Our presence was acknowledged but we left that night feeling lonelier than when we had walked in.

Few people want to miss getting together with family. Few people want to feel lonely on a holiday. Few people want to break from tradition or be told they can’t do what they’ve always done. I get that. I think.

But can I offer you a challenge of sorts?

Lean into those feelings of loss and grief and loneliness. Let them increase your compassion for those who always or often spend the holidays apart from loved ones. For military families stationed overseas. For people imprisoned. For refugees who live in a country not their home. For healthcare workers and first responders who spend time on call during the holidays. For retail store employees who can’t afford to not work a holiday. For those whose loved ones have died and will never rejoin their holiday table. For those who are estranged from their families for whatever reasons.

Let this holiday season be an opportunity to increase your compassion for those whose life situation is not exactly like yours. Let it be a chance to learn what it’s like. Let it make you grateful for what you have, that in all likelihood, next year will be “back to normal.” Let it open your eyes to see what you’ve been missing–empathy, compassion, understanding.

Photo by Josh Calabrese on Unsplash

I don’t believe COVID-19 was sent to us by the universe to teach us lessons, but I do believe we can learn from anything, if we choose to. So, whatever your holidays look like this year, may they give you a new way of seeing the world around you.

#Run4Refugees: My journey is finished; for millions of people, it continues

Hi, I’m Lisa, and I take terrible selfies when I’m trying to walk and run.

This morning I completed a virtual 5K called “Running From 2020” because let’s be honest, that’s all I’ve wanted to do this year is escape. But those final three miles were also the last of my 20-mile quest for CWS’ Run4Refugees campaign. Running from and running for. My life encompasses a bit of both.

So, here were are at the end of this fundraising journey. For me, it’s over. I completed 20 miles on foot this week, running 15 of them, walking 5. That’s an incredible feat for my feet. (The jokes are free, folks!) Even though I’m finished, the journey for millions of people around the world continues or is just beginning. The journey of a refugee is long and winding, often with years of waiting. So just because I’m done with these miles, please don’t think that the refugee crisis is over.

Consider donating today.

And now, my final three reasons for accepting this challenge:

18. Running (or traveling) long distances requires a support team. I’ve never run more than five miles, but as a family we are increasing our hiking miles. We were on the Appalachian Trail a few weeks ago, talking about how through-hikers get the supplies they need from strategic outposts along the trail. Any kind of running race has water stops and support personnel. Ultramarathoners take people with them for medical and other needs. For refugees, CWS and organizations like them are the support team. Imagine traveling for hundreds of miles without knowing when the next food or water stop might be. (If I don’t know there’s going to be a bathroom stop on a trip of more than 2 hours, I start to get nervous!) Imagine not knowing how much of your own supplies to pack and what might be available when you get there. Refugees need a support team for their journey, and I’m honored to be part of it in any small way.

19. Just because something is hard or difficult doesn’t mean it’s bad or you’ve done something wrong. Also, pain is part of the process. My legs were hurting today as I ran. Which they should have been considering not only did I run and walk 20 miles this week, I also worked for five days. I’ve thought in the past that if some part of my life is difficult, it must mean I’ve done something wrong. If the income isn’t enough to pay the bills, if it feels like we’re being pulled in too many directions, if life hurts … but sometimes that’s just the way it goes. People who leave their homes to become refugees are facing a difficult road. But that doesn’t mean they chose the wrong path. Anything I can do to make it easier, I want to do.

20. Humanity is worth fighting for. Even the ugly parts. The trash fire that is this year has made me wonder if letting humans run wild with the earth and each other was a colossal mistake. One time, on a hike, when I saw the number of spotted lanternflies (an invasive species that is threatening trees in our area of Pennsylvania) in small area, I quipped, “Maybe we should just let them have the planet.” Some days I want to give up the fight because it’s hard. But then I see beautiful things worth fighting for, and I remember that even the ugliest most detestable things in our world can be redeemed. Humanity is worth it. I’ll keep telling myself this even when evidence proves otherwise. Joining CWS in this fight is one way to keep the faith that all is not lost and the world can be made right.

Thank you for reading and following along with me on this journey! I hope you’ve learned something new about refugees or were reminded why fighting for what we believe in is worth it. And, please, consider making a small donation to CWS in support of their global work.

Take care!

#Run4Refugees Day 6: Closing in on the end

Officially, I have logged 16.9 miles on my quest toward 20 miles on foot this week, and that’s exactly where I want to be because I’m running another virtual 5k tomorrow. Because I’m SO close to 17 miles, I’m going to give you three more reasons today and the final three reasons tomorrow. It’s not too late to donate. I’ve surpassed the $500 mark in donations, which leaves me in awe. Thank you for the support! Donations are matched today and tomorrow, if you’re still interested. And now, on to the reasons!

15. Refugees often travel hundreds of miles on foot or crammed into vehicles or on overloaded boats to reach a place of relative safety. I have a lot of comforts in my life. I start getting uncomfortable if too many people close in on my personal bubble. I don’t know how it would feel to choose this kind of discomfort out of desperation. Logging 20 miles on foot is not comfortable. My legs remind me daily of what I’ve done. Mine is a chosen challenge, not made out of desperation, but it’s reminding me of those whose choices are often between staying in a place that’s unsafe but is home or leaving everything behind and fleeing to a place of relative safety that isn’t anything like home. I can choose some temporary discomfort.

16. I want you to know how much a community is enriched by its refugee neighbors. Lancaster, PA, where I live, has an abundant refugee community, most obviously reflected in the variety of global flavors offered in local restaurants. Refugees live and work in our community. One has written a book about his journey to The United States with a well-known graphic novelist. My interactions with refugees have shown me that I have a lot to learn about hospitality and friendship and community from refugees.

17. Asylum-seekers, like those who arrive at the southern border of the United States, share many of the same plights as refugees. And when I heard reports last month that women were being forced to have hysterectomies, I was overcome with despair. It is far too easy for us to look away or forget that people–children and women mostly–are being detained in conditions we wouldn’t accept for our own children. It’s easy to dismiss it as fake news, but when organizations I trust report on those conditions, from the frontlines, I choose to believe them. I can feel despair, but I can’t let that be the stopping point. Awareness. Support. Advocacy. Running these miles combines all three.