Beauty on the Backroads

Stories of grace for life's unexpected turns

Cinderella Mom

If you think Jesus would have come into your home that day and not issued a strong rebuke to the head of household, you are mistaken. These words of condemnation have been haunting me for days now. They aren’t all that different than the soundtrack I play in my head on an almost-daily basis. It’s…

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This is 40

I am nesting. On Saturday I emptied the refrigerator. Last summer’s homemade pickles in their jars. The bread ends that seem to multiply on every shelf. The eggs. The milk. The fruit and veggies. All of it sat on the floor or the counter as I carefully removed the shelves and wiped them down with…

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Beauty on the Backroads {or Why I Changed the Name of my Blog}

I’ve heard that life is like a highway. And it definitely seems like that sometimes. The pace of life swirls around me at dizzying speeds. We’re all so busy. In such a hurry. Always somewhere to be, something else to do. I’m a get-to-the-point, get-there-quick kind of girl. I don’t like to waste time on…

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First Friday Five {April}

It’s raining as I write this and the temperature has been swinging from warm to cool. That must mean it is finally and officially spring. It is my favorite season, usually. Although this year for some reason the arrival of spring has me amped for summer. Winter was not all that hard this year from a weather standpoint so maybe I don’t feel quite so desperate for it this year.

But it’s here! And I survived my kids’ April Fool’s Day “jokes.” (If I made a list of things I do not love, this would be on it.)

Lucky for you, this is a list of what I do love right now.

  1. Mystery novels from my favorite TV shows. If you didn’t know, we gave up TV for Lent. It’s going … okay. But I’ve been able to fulfill my need for screen stories by turning to the pages of the books some of my favorite shows were based on. I’ve read a Phryne Fisher novel (Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries, Netflix) and a Kurt Wallander novel (Wallander, PBS). I haven’t read a lot of mysteries in my time, but I loved both of these books. Maybe because I had seen the episodes but maybe just because mysteries are kind of fun.
  2. Harissa. Especially in my eggs. I do not know how we discovered this middle eastern paste/sauce but we have bought two jars of it now and it’s good on a lot of stuff. (It’s a little spicy but more smokey, I think.) But we have a scrambled eggs recipe that uses it (and mayo–sounds gross but don’t knock it till you try it) and I will not eat regular scrambled eggs ever again in my house. We found a jar at a discount grocery, but we also bought a small can of it from a Middle Eastern stand at our local farm market.
  3. Division of labor. Maybe for some of you this is not a big thing, but with my husband’s work schedule leaving him with three weekdays open, we have been dividing the household labor more than we ever have. Earlier this week, I went to do volunteer work at the kids’ school and he went to the grocery store. (He loves this errand more than I do.) We work together on the dishes. It’s only taken us 10 married years to figure out that if we work together on these things then one of us (I won’t name names but her name rhymes with Pisa) won’t go completely out of her mind when there are too many things to do and not enough time to do them.
  4. The village. You know, the “it takes a village” village. It is super difficult for me to ask for help from people, but (see previous favorite thing) if I don’t, I get overwhelmed. And I’m learning that it’s okay to ask for help. And to offer it, authentically, to others. We were at a roller skating party recently and our son needed help. I did not want to put on skates for fear that if I fell I would hurt my back again. My husband didn’t want to put on skates because he needs his back and legs for work. (Yes, we are old fogey types with failing bodies.) Another parent offered to help our son once around the rink. It was great! This same family is going to help us out with transportation to a birthday party. In a couple of weeks, I’ll need to call on someone else for help picking up from an after-school activity. I believed for a long time that I had to suffer alone and in silence because motherhood was my job and my responsibility and asking for help made me look weak or incapable. (LIES.) I’m still not awesome at offering to help others, but I’m getting there. And if I offer to help someone, I really mean it because it happens so seldom.
  5. Me. That sounds terribly prideful, but next month I turn 39, which means 40 is knocking at the door, and for the first time in my life, I really like who I am. At the skating party, I was fine with being me. I didn’t feel inferior or like I shouldn’t be there. I could talk to people without much awkwardness. I’ve been doing more out of the house things, and I think that’s because I know better my place and my value in the world. And none of it is based on other people or circumstances. (I had this really strange urge a few weeks ago to tell everyone I met that they were full of divine light. I didn’t say anything out loud to anyone, but I felt so full of light myself that I almost couldn’t contain it.)

This might be the weirdest of the favorite lists I’ve posted, but it is what it is. What’s got you excited lately? Do tell!

You can’t even imagine: Review of The Polygamist’s Daughter by Anna LeBaron

A couple of weeks ago, I told a group of people that I was reading a book about a polygamist cult. (I had a good reason. Kind of.) And the reactions varied from disbelief to horrified.

That’s a little about how I felt about this memoir. Though The Polygamist’s Daughter by Anne LeBaron contains the kinds of stories you might see on a crime drama on television, this was her real-life childhood as the daughter of notorious polygamist Ervil LeBaron. (Disclaimer: I received a free copy of the book through the Tyndale Blog Network. My opinion reflected in this review is not affected by that.)

If this was a novel, I would have found it thrilling. A page-turner. But because this actually happened to a child, I hovered between sadness and despair. Anna LeBaron recounts tales of last-minute moves from one state to another, leaving everything behind, being dropped off in Mexico to stay with other members of her father’s cult and having to sell things door-to-door to earn money for the family. She is often separated from her mother and rarely sees her father. She is surrounded by people who are related to her in some way. (The book begins: “At age nine, I had forty-nine siblings.) There are moments of peace and relative security, but much of her stories are full of longing for a normal life.

The good news of Anna’s story is that she is now a living, breathing picture of the redemptive work of God. She found family and Jesus and monogamy. She was even able to reconnect with some of her larger extended family in adulthood.   Hers is an incredible story, yes. It’s also one of hope. Though she grew up one of many children, overlooked and forgotten, she became a woman known and loved by God.

It is not an easy read, especially if you have young children and can’t imagine dropping them off in another country and leaving them in the care of virtual strangers. But it’s a worthwhile read to know that no matter how awful life’s circumstances, God can work with them and in them to bring about something beautiful.

Telling this story is so brave. And it’s so necessary. Don’t let it scare you to read about Anna’s life.