Stories of grace for life's unexpected turns
If you think Jesus would have come into your home that day and not issued a strong rebuke to the head of household, you are mistaken. These words of condemnation have been haunting me for days now. They aren’t all that different than the soundtrack I play in my head on an almost-daily basis. It’s…
I am nesting. On Saturday I emptied the refrigerator. Last summer’s homemade pickles in their jars. The bread ends that seem to multiply on every shelf. The eggs. The milk. The fruit and veggies. All of it sat on the floor or the counter as I carefully removed the shelves and wiped them down with…
I’ve heard that life is like a highway. And it definitely seems like that sometimes. The pace of life swirls around me at dizzying speeds. We’re all so busy. In such a hurry. Always somewhere to be, something else to do. I’m a get-to-the-point, get-there-quick kind of girl. I don’t like to waste time on…
Today’s post is part of a syncroblog on leadership sponsored by Evangelical Seminary. The question up for discussion: What makes a good leader? Click here to join the conversation and see what others are saying.
My husband and I are smack dab in the middle of the toughest leadership assignment we’ve ever had. Not military service. Not deadline editing. Not youth ministry.
Parenting.
With two tiny followers, following us 24/7, our leadership styles become painfully obvious. My husband, at his best, is a patient teacher, guiding our children in the ways of faith and life. At my best, I’m an encourager, cheering on their efforts to learn and grow and be independent.
At our worst? Well, that’s a different story.
I find that in parenting, as in other leadership positions, finding balance is frustrating. Our kids, who are 4 and 2, are past the point of needing us to help them all the time but not yet to the point where they don’t need us at all. When they were babies and solely dependent on us, tiring as it was, I knew what to expect of my leadership. Now, though, sometimes they need me and sometimes they don’t.
So leadership becomes like a dance. And not so much the graceful ballroom type of dancing but more the hokey pokey kind. (Sing it with me: “You do the hokey-pokey and you turn yourself around … that’s what it’s all about!”)
A good leader knows when to put a hand in to help and when to take a step back and let the one being led do the work.
Like when Jesus called Peter to walk on water. He didn’t take Peter’s hand and help him out of the boat. He let him take the first steps. Then, when he was (almost literally) in over his head, he stepped in to keep Peter from drowning. He let the disciples watch him, follow him, learn from him, then he sent them out on their own to minister.
When my 4-year-old is smearing peanut butter all over a slice of bread (and the table and the chair and the floor), it’s so easy to want to take the knife and do it for her. When my 2-year-old wants to grab the milk jug from the fridge (and I hover nervously so he doesn’t drop it), it’s easy to take it from his little hands and do it myself. As leaders, it’s easy to do the hard stuff for the people in our care. We can micromanage, hover and criticize because the task wasn’t done the way we would do it. It’s harder to step back and let people learn.
Good leaders can see when a person’s in trouble and needs help. Good leaders recognize the right time to let someone run with a project and give it their own personality. Good leaders trust. And encourage. They teach and teach again, with patience and compassion. Good leaders step back and hope the ones they’ve led go further than they ever did.
I’ve read that good leaders don’t make followers; they make more leaders.
So, what’s your take? What makes a good leader? And what have you learned from the good leaders in your life?
I can find no appropriate words to describe how beautiful Susan Meissner’s new book is. Magnificent. Stunning. Fabulous. Somehow, they all fall short.
The Girl in the Glass is a masterpiece, a story that draws you in from the first page and doesn’t let go. Written in the voice of Nora, the long-dead Medici daughter, and Meg, the 30-year-old, travel book editor who longs to see Florence, Italy but has never been, the book brings these characters into the room. I could feel Meg’s longings, disappointments and emptiness. I could hear the same from Nora on the eve of her wedding. And as the story moves along, I wanted to break out my dusty pictures of Florence and relive a trip I took almost 14 years ago. Meissner captures Florence in a way that made me feel like I was there yesterday. And if you’ve never been, you’ll feel like you have been after reading this book.
Usually when I read a good book, I want to tear through it to find the ending. (I’m not a read the ending before I’ve read the rest kind of girl.) Not so with this. I wanted to savor each word. Take it in. Linger. I didn’t want it to end, even it meant good things for the characters.
One of Meissner’s skills is the intertwining of history and present-day. She did it with A Sound Among the Trees, the only other book of hers I’ve read, and it’s captivating. I can’t wait to pick up more from her.
This is a love story. But not in the way you think. It’s less about girl-meets-boy and more about girl-meets-city and finds more of herself than she knew existed.
Can I say it again? I loved this book. Too bad I don’t speak any Italian. Maybe then I’d find a word that fits.
Read the first chapter here.
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In exchange for this review, I received a free electronic copy of this book from WaterbrookMultnomah Publishing Group through its Blogging for Books program. For a chance to win your own copy, click here and rank this review on the Blogging for Books site.
