Beauty on the Backroads

Stories of grace for life's unexpected turns

birthday celebrations

March had 31 days and I felt every one of them: A monthly round-up

March and January both have 31 days, so I’m not sure why March feels so much longer. Maybe it’s because I know spring is approaching and the back-and-forth winter-to-spring weather of March makes the month drag on. Whatever the reason, I felt ALL 31 days of March. Here’s our monthly roundup of What We Did (birthday!), What We Ate (cake!), What We Watched (Murderville, anyone?) and What We Read (so many books!).

What We Did

At the very start of the month, our son had a basketball playoff game to close out the season. The loss was tough on the boys but we celebrated a great season. They were such a fun bunch of kids to watch.

The end of basketball season rolled right into lacrosse practices, which led right into the team’s first scrimmage and first game. Outdoor spring sports are a whole mood in March. The scrimmage was 70 degrees. The first game was 40 degrees with a wind chill.

Extra fans for a cold lacrosse match

One afternoon after work, I stopped by the local police station and filed a police report about my stolen social security number. They fingerprinted me, which is more concerning when you’re standing in the place where they book people accused of crimes. But at least my identity theft is officially on the record now.

Our daughter turned 14 during a bomb cyclone snow event, which is basically par for the course for her birthday. It’s either snowing or the world is shutting down for COVID when her birthday rolls around. We had a small celebration at home, then the following week, she took a friend out to dinner, then a week later, we celebrated with my parents. 

Middle school play. FINALLY, after months of rehearsals, it was showtime for Hurricane Smith and the Garden of the Golden Monkey.

I’ll be honest: I was expecting an awkward, cringey middle school play, but this performance was stellar from the entire cast.

Our daughter went to the cast party afterward and our son slept over at the hotel with his grandparents so Phil and I hung out at a pub and ate some food while we waited for the cast party to be done. The life of teen/tween parents is not so different from toddlers: late nights, little sleep, lots of worry, epic meltdowns.

I asked my parents to stay an extra day so I could take the day off and spend it with them. We bummed around a few shops in Lancaster and Lititz and bought a few things at Costco. We ate lunch out, too. It was an enjoyable day.

That same day, Phil’s truck broke down on the way to work, so on the plus side, we’re only using gas from one vehicle right now and I know where he works because I’ve had to drive him there several mornings.

What We Ate

It is still soup season until the weather says it isn’t, and even then, I could eat soup. This month we had Coconut Curry Lentil Soup and Chunky Vegan Potato Soup. (If I were ever to become a full-fledge vegan, I think I’d call myself the Chunky Vegan).

For the impromptu birthday celebration, we grabbed some food from Central Market including soups from Isabelle Cuisine, empanadas from Empanada Gourmet, and cake from The Goodie Shop.

As per usual, we ate corned beef and cabbage on St. Patrick’s Day.

Our meal out for the birthday celebration was Mexican food from Cocina Mexicana. I had chilaquiles verdes. Other food consumed included burritos, tacos, queso, chips and salsa.

We also had ice cream cupcakes for dessert from Good Life Ice Cream. A week later we had a mixed berry cake and two kinds of ice cream for the birthday treat with the grandparents.

As we waited for the cast party to wrap up, Phil and I hung out at Quip’s Pub and ate a Scotch egg and whiskey-butter parmesan fries.

We also tried a new-to-us pizza place near our church: UnCommon Pizza. They have a breakfast pizza which intrigued me: it has a garlic butter sauce with scrambled eggs and two cheeses. We added bacon. We also ate salads and garlic bread.

What We Watched

SNL clips. When I need to laugh at the state of the world and other random stuff, this is where I go.

State of the Union address. Gosh, this seems like so long ago. I know I didn’t stay up for all of it.

Murderville. Laugh-out-loud funny. Netflix. Will Arnett is a goofball but the guest stars are the ones that really get me.

Bake Squad. The girl and I were on our own for dinner one night because of schedules, so we watched an episode of this baking competition for a good cause on Netflix. Enjoyable.

Welcome to Earth. The Will Smith documentary on Disney Plus. An episode about scent. Pretty much always blows my mind.

Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle. This revamp of the classic with The Rock, Jack Black, Kevin Hart and Karen Gillen is HILARIOUS. We laughed so hard we missed dialogue. I loved this one. So much better than the original.

Outlander. It’s back! Finally. Episode 1 was epic and sets up this very dramatic season. I am both thrilled and terrified about what’s to come.

Turning Red. What an amazing movie. Don’t believe all the negativity you might read about it.

Mulan. The live-action one.  Also so much better than the animated “original.”

The World According to Jeff Goldblum. An episode about barbecue that also featured cricket farming!

Around the World in 80 Days. We finally got back to it. Our schedules have been busy and TV has not been a priority.

College basketball. I filled out a bracket this year so I had some more-than-usual interest. Also, Illinois was in the tournament. For a bit. My interest waned after the first weekend.

Supermarket Sweep. Leslie Jones for life.

Sanditon. The second season. I had feelings two minutes into the first episode. I’m going to watch more because I can’t quit a Jane Austen inspired show. But I’m still mad about season 1.

Bridgerton. Everything returns! I’m balancing three shows in my limited free time.

What We Read

Books I Finished:

Chirp by Kate Messner. Two reasons: It’s on the Pennsylvania Young Readers Choice Awards List for this year and it takes place at a cricket farm in the Northeast. I’m intrigued by this kind of farming. This story surprisingly tackled a serious issue in the midst of a minor mystery. I enjoyed it more than I thought I would. It’s on the younger side of what I normally read for YA/middle grade, but still important and valuable.

What The Wind Knows by Amy Harmon. A friend who knows I like Outlander recommended this time-crossing novel, and I’m so glad she did. While Outlander is in a class of its own, this story kept me turning pages and wanting/not wanting to find out what happens. The historical part is set in 1920s Ireland during the Irish Civil War. It was fascinating to read about this time in history and I loved following Anne and Thomas’ love story.

Pride by Ibi Zoboi . This is a Pride and Prejudice remix I picked up at a school book fair, and it is so well done.

One To Watch by Kate Stayman-London. Plus-size fashion blogger Bea Schumacher agrees to go on a reality TV dating show to find love and bust stereotypes about who is worthy of love. One of my favorite recent reads. I’ve never seen an episode of The Bachelor or any other shows like that, but this book almost made me want to get in on the drama.

Harry’s Trees by Jon Cohen. An unforgettable, magical book that I will love for all time. This goes on my list of all-time favorites.

The Mysterious Affair at Styles by Agatha Christie. I’m hooked. I realized there are about a bazillion books by Agatha Christie, so at least I know I’ll have books to read for the foreseeable future.

Reading with the kids:

Spy School Goes South by Stuart Gibbs. Another in our series.

Other reading:

The Bible. If you’ve been around here for a while, maybe this doesn’t sound like it should be noteworthy, but over the past few years, I’ve struggled to read the Bible because of my own personal struggles with my faith. So, the fact that I’ve picked it up again (not a lot, mind you) is significant. I’m still working out my relationship with the Bible.

Books in progress:

Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden. A friend who read Redeeming Love after I talked about it recommended this one. I’m about halfway through it and I’m not sure what to think. I can’t wait to talk with her about it.

I Am Malala. Still working on this one during my lunch breaks at work.

When you have a birthday

I woke up on the first day of my 37th year full before the day began.

This is not the norm for me.  On my birthday or any other day.

The weather promised to be perfect–sunny, 80 degrees, not too humid.

And the day was pregnant with promise.

Birthdays are, for me, a love-hate affair. I enjoy the celebration. I love cake and ice cream. But in recent years, my birthdays have been anti-climatic, to say the least. While my husband was in seminary, he almost always had finals the week of my birthday and May 4 would become like any other day. I got used to lowering (or abandoning) my expectations for the day. I’m not big on surprises, but a part of me has always wanted to feel special on my birthday.

That’s normal, right?

So, on Sunday night, knowing that Monday was packed full of meetings and a birthday celebration was going to be hard to squeeze in, I did something I rarely do.

I asked for what I wanted.

“It doesn’t matter what we do,” I said, as we finished up dinner. “But tomorrow, I’d like to do something special for my birthday.”

Rather than feel selfish or needy by that declaration, I felt grown-up and free.

Maybe that’s why Monday dawned with such hope. I was grateful before the day began for this life I’ve been gifted, with all its messes and miracles.

What happened throughout the day was icing on the proverbial cake. (There was actual cake, too.)

As my husband got up to make my coffee and breakfast for me and the kids, I read tweets from my brother, and opened an e-mail with a generous gift inside from him and his wife. Breakfast is my favorite meal, so it’s always a gift to have someone else make it. (And for it to not be cereal or toast. Egg sandwiches, in case you were curious.)

Phil and our son left to head to the grocery store to plan a special dinner, and the Facebook greetings rolled in from across the country and across the years of my life. I said, in reflecting on the day, that a Facebook birthday is like “This is your life.” College friends. Hometown friends. Online friends I’ve never met in person.

Some made the tears come, like this one from a pastor friend in Illinois:

Today, look back in awe at how God has shaped and led you; then look forward in anticipation of all that God will do to complete the beautiful work of art that is you. Experience God’s blessing on your birthday!

Look back. Look forward. Both together, not either or. A day before, I read this quote from Madeleine L’Engle, and it is fitting for birthdays:

madeleine quote

I have wanted to lose some of the ages I’ve been, but in my 37th year, I am increasingly grateful for the ways those years have shaped me.

When the guys returned, I headed out to my counseling appointment. Going to counseling on my birthday might not seem like a treat, but it’s becoming a valued part of my life and routine.

“Don’t cry too much on your birthday,” my husband said as I left because I have left a lot of tears in my counselor’s office. I did cry, but they were mostly happy tears because maybe for the first time in my life I love who I am and who I am becoming and I feel loved. By others. By God. By me.

I spent the afternoon with my son. We volunteered at the school library, which we hadn’t done for a couple of weeks. We enjoyed the outside weather. The porch is my favorite place in the spring/summer/fall. I read. I tended my small collection of plants, including a hanging basket of flowers that arrived while I was gone. A sweet couple from church dropped them off just to say “thanks.” I continued to read the messages of well wishes. I talked to my grandparents. I picked up my daughter from the bus.

And I watched my husband prepare a birthday feast for dinner. He grilled some of my favorites: bell peppers, shrimp, steak. Paired with rice it was a satisfying and special meal, topped off with a moose tracks ice cream cake. The day would have been perfect without it, but I’m glad I said something the day before.

We headed off to church for meetings my husband and I lead, once again grateful that we are part of a community of faith that recognizes and values our gifts and lets us use them.

We fell into bed exhausted and my heart was fuller than it had been when I woke up. I can’t think of a better way to have spent my birthday than being with people I love, doing ordinary things, celebrating life and health. It was extraordinary in its ordinariness.

This morning it was a little harder to get out of bed, but more birthday wishes trickled in, including a video from our 3-year-old nephew. In the middle of singing “Happy birthday,” he asked his mom if they could come to our house and share cake. We are too many miles apart for that, but the sentiment warms my heart.

We still have cake, and a birthday date night scheduled for Friday, but for all intents and purposes, the celebration is over.

The gratitude continues, though, and my hope for the year to come is to find these ordinary graces in my life no matter the day.

I am 37, and it is good to be alive.