Beauty on the Backroads

Stories of grace for life's unexpected turns

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Why the Gospel isn't a sales pitch

I sat on the porch soaking in the warmish temperatures while the kids rode their bikes back and forth, back and forth. It was the best we could do the last weekend of February, and we desperately needed relief from cabin fever.

Patches of grass peeked through the mounds of snow, a sight we thought we might not see again until the calendar officially said “spring.” With my nose in a book, I barely noticed the cars passing by. We live on a busy-ish street on a lane that accesses a business behind our house, so traffic is normal.

A van with a glaring advertisement on the side whipped into our lane and parked. The driver hopped out and immediately began shouting at me about the delicious meat they were selling and how they’d just struck a deal with a Mr. Frank down the street and do we eat beef and would I be interested in seeing some steaks? megaphone

My protests went unheard as a second man got out of the van. They opened the back and each lifted a box of meat. I watched amused as they tried to find a way to the porch that didn’t involve walking through a yard full of snow. To their credit, they forged ahead, making witty comments about the snow.

They dropped two boxes on the porch while I sat on the glider, still holding my book open while the kids stood frozen in place. The second man introduced himself while the first man retreated to the van and made calls on his cell phone. I shook his hand but didn’t offer my name because I didn’t want this to get personal.

He handed me a brochure and said to not worry about the prices because he was like Monty Hall. (Would someone my age even know who Monty Hall  is? He’s lucky I watched a lot of old game shows as a kid.) Then he made me promise that if we made a deal I wouldn’t tell my neighbors what I paid for this delicious meat.

He opened a box of steaks and showed me the color of them, told me how his “lady” makes meatloaf out of the burgers but he just cooks burgers because he’s lazy in the kitchen. He pointed out the date the steaks were packed and slammed grocery stores for their labeling practices. He used the words “all natural” numerous times, as if to convince me of the meat’s quality. The same meat that was riding around in the back of a van.

He asked if we had an extra freezer and while we do, it doesn’t work right now so I told him “no.” He offered me one for free.

When he finished his presentation, he asked how the meat looked, and while I couldn’t deny the pleasing appearance of the beef, we honestly don’t have the money to buy a freezer full of meat right now. I told him so. He looked insulted. “You mean if I sell you $300 worth of meat for $150, you can’t help me out?” No, I couldn’t. $150 pays the bills right now.

He packed up his boxes, called his associate over, and they tromped through the snow with one open box of beef and an unopened box of chicken. They offered a half-hearted “have a good day” as they left.

I breathed a sigh of relief and told my kids that if anyone ever approached them like that and I wasn’t outside that they needed to come get me. Right away. I didn’t want to scare them because I don’t believe life should be lived in fear, but I wanted them to know that not everyone who seems friendly is friendly.

—

Sometimes, I think we try to sell the Gospel like this.

We look around us at the people in our path, and we try to find a willing victim customer. There, that person’s not wearing a cross or I’ve seen them working in the yard on Sundays or I’ve heard them swear. They need Jesus, and I have Jesus, so I will offer them the best gift ever.

I agree that people need Jesus. I do. Every day. That hasn’t stopped because I call myself a Christian. I still do un-Christian things and rely on the grace of His love and another day.

And I agree that we have good news to tell people. It’s the best news there is. But somewhere along the way, it’s become more like a sales pitch.

We barge into someone’s space and plunk down a box of good news. We open it up and ask leading questions that have them nodding. We’re slick and polished, but we’re also in a hurry because the world is dying and we’ve got to sell this Gospel before it all goes to hell.

We make promises God can’t keep.

And we walk away stunned when our offer is rejected.

Why wouldn’t someone want this good news?

—

The hard part is that I don’t have any answers. I have no earthly idea why some people choose Jesus and some people don’t. And I have no idea the best way to share this good news so that people will respond.

What I do know is that I wouldn’t buy steak from a guy in a van unless I knew personally someone else who had. And I wouldn’t spend what I didn’t have. The truth is, if I’d had the money to buy the meat, I still would have had to get our freezer fixed to make room for it. That doesn’t mean I don’t like meat or don’t want a deal. It just means I have some business to take care of first.

Maybe that’s how it is with the Gospel.

For some, maybe there’s some business to take care of first. Maybe they’ll ask around and find others they trust who know this Jesus. Maybe nothing will ever convince them that the news is actually as good as it sounds.

Maybe instead of trying to sell strangers a box of steaks, we need to take it slow. Get to know them. Let them see how we live. Grill out and let them smell the steak cooking over hot coals. Invite them over for a meal, without any thought to whether they’ll buy the meat we’re so ecstatic about, just because we think they matter.

Maybe we leave people with love, instead of fear.

Because I’d hate for someone to have to tell their kids not to talk to me because I tried to sell them Jesus.

—

Jesus got my attention when I was 19 and brokenhearted. Lonely. Miserable. I was looking for Him but was too afraid to tell anyone or ask if they knew the way.

He broke through those fears with a whisper in my heart I was sure everyone in the room could hear.

All that matters is what I think of you.

I didn’t answer an altar call. In fact, in the years that followed that internal decision to live for Him, I felt guilty that I hadn’t ever walked an aisle and publicly proclaimed my conversion. I was baptized, yes, but it was not in a church. It happened in a pond and I was surrounded by family and a few close friends. I don’t have a certificate to prove it. Maybe by some standards my conversion is invalid, but I’ve felt the changes over time. I’ve heard His voice, felt His leading, and when I look back on the journey, not once did Jesus ever sell Himself to me.

He simply said, Come. Let’s walk.

And I did.

 

What the Bible looks like in slow motion: Review of The Thief by Stephanie Landsem

Biblical fiction is one of my favorite genres, and Stephanie Landsem is fast establishing herself as a talented re-teller of familiar stories. The Thief, her second novel, is the story of a Jewish woman, Nissa, who is caring for her blind brother, and Longinus, a Roman centurion, who witness a miracle by the mysterious Nazarene, Jesus. (Disclaimer: I received a free copy of the ebook from Litfuse Publicity Group in exchange for my review.) the thief

Nissa is hiding a secret that could kill her, and Longinus is holding on to bitterness over a friend’s death, and The Thief follows them both on a journey that will change their lives. When I read The Well, Landsem’s first novel, last year, I was impressed with the way the story caused me to rethink the characters in John 4. In The Thief, Landsem zooms in on Jerusalem and the events leading up to Jesus’ final Passover, culminating in his crucifixion and setting up the story for her third book, The Tomb. I feel like reading this story drew me in to the events I often skim over in the Bible. I could see, hear and feel, and because the focus was on ordinary people in Jerusalem, I got a better understanding of what it was like to live in that time.

The Thief is captivating and emotional, a story I couldn’t put down. And it whetted my appetite for the next book. thiefbloggerbutton

Don’t miss Stephanie Landsem‘s outstanding sophomore effort, The Thief.

Best-selling author Tosca Lee had this to say of the book: Filled with memorable characters, The Thief is a tale of hopelessness turned to hope, of high stakes made higher, and ultimate love. What happens when a character at the lowest rung of society crosses paths with the most well-known figure in history? The story of The Thief. I couldn’t stop reading.

Stephanie is hosting a Kindle Fire HDX and book giveaway at her website.

CLICK THE BUTTON to find out more and enter to win. Find out what readers are saying HERE. (Click the REVIEWS bar.)

5 on Friday: Board games for families with young children

Board games, it seems, have always been a part of my life. One of my fondest childhood memories is spending weekend nights with my grandparents, playing board games. Monopoly, in particular. My grandfather had a strategy of buying every property he landed on, which diminished his cash flow temporarily but always profited him in the end. And my grandmother would exclaim with glee “Mine!” whenever someone else landed on one of the properties she owned.

It was there, in the family room of their home, that I learned to love board games. Through the years, playing board games together became part of our family holiday gatherings. Games like Outburst and Scattergories and Trivial Pursuit and Guesstures. When I moved into my own apartment, the board games continued as my friends and I would play Trivial Pursuit late into the night (and early morning) until one of us collected all the pieces.

We’re now–finally–to the age of parenting when we can play board games as a family. Our kids are 4 and almost-6, which we’re discovering is a great time for games. They’re close enough in age to be able to mostly play the same games.

kids gamesHere are five we’ve discovered as a family that are tons of fun.

1. Monopoly Junior Party. One denomination of money. You buy every space you land on. A good starter Monopoly. Doesn’t take too long, and even our 4-year-old can play mostly on his own.

2. What’s in the Cat’s Hat? A sort of reverse hide-and-seek/20 questions game. Imaginative.

3. Guess Who? A classic. Simple. Easy to play. And because it’s for two players only, I make the children play together. (Insert evil mom laugh here.)

4. Uno Moo. We’re almost ready to graduate to Uno, I think, but this one is so much fun with the animal shapes that I’ll be sad to let it go. Watch out for the stinky skunks!

5. Don’t Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus. Based on the books by Mo Willems. There’s some strategy involved in this one, if you want. Or you can just move your bus around the board to collect all the items and avoid the pigeon.

What are you favorite family board games?

As good as any rom-com movie: Review of A Marriage in Middlebury by Anita Higman

Small town. Tea. Lost love. What’s not to like?

Anita Higman’s A Marriage in Middlebury is a sweet romance full of all the elements that make me sigh at a good romantic comedy. (Disclaimer: I received a free copy of the book from the author in exchange for my review.)a-marriage-in-middlebury

First, there’s the likable, down-to-earth heroine. Charlotte Hill is the owner of Middlebury’s tea room, where she serves her customers with grace, humor and compassion, uniquely blending teas to fit their personalities. She’s a friend to all, including a young boy with a troubled family. She’d love to have a family of her own, but that ship sailed more than a decade earlier, when her high school love Sam asked her to marry him and she turned him down. Charlotte is delightful, the kind of heroine you think would be your friend, like Sandra Bullock in While You Were Sleeping or Julia Roberts in just about anything.

Then there’s Sam Wilder, the gone-but-not-forgotten love who returns to Middlebury with a fiancée in tow. He’s not the hunky hero of some stories, but he, too, is a likable character. Think Bill Pullman. (For some reason I want to compare this book to While You Were Sleeping.) He’s caring and dependable and dedicated. You can almost see the chemistry between these two on the pages of the book. (I’m not always a fan of books-become-movies but I secretly wouldn’t mind seeing this one on the screen.)

The story is full of colorful side characters, too. There’s the old man atheist who winds up at Easter dinner with a room full of Christians. The mysterious homeless man who is good with plants. The single pastor being set up on blind dates by his parishioners. And the antique dealer who acts first and thinks later but with good intentions.

If that’s not enough to sell this book as a must-read, then consider the writing. In the first book I read by Higman, I was blown away by her use of metaphors. It holds true for this book, too. There’s a casual, friendly style to her writing but it’s full of spiritual insight without feeling forced. Higman’s insights about life and faith flow naturally through the story. I love reading what she writes.

 

What cooking teaches me about writing

I never thought I’d like to cook. I was forced to learn and experiment when I lived on my own after college, and while I’ve always liked to bake, cooking has taken a little longer to enjoy. But I love it now. And I have my husband to thank. His love of cooking was infectious in our early days of dating and marriage. Cooking together was something we looked forward to. Those days are few and far between now but he has taught me so much.

While baking cookies and putting together a beef stew last week, I realized that cooking and writing–both creative endeavors–have some things in common. And what I’ve learned about cooking relates to my writing. Here’s what I discovered that cooking can teach me about writing:

Recipes are a good place to start. Follow the lead of someone who’s done this before. Then improvise. Add your own style. I used to fear deviating from the recipe. I would follow it to the letter, afraid that if I added anything, I would ruin it. When I’ve had to improvise because we didn’t have the ingredients necessary, it’s worked out just fine. In writing, the same goes. There are patterns that work. Devices that others have used that are helpful to learn and follow. That doesn’t mean all my writing is going to sound like someone else’s work, but it’s a good place to start.

Similarly, I need to learn the basics. Knowing the difference between a tablespoon and a teaspoon is essential. Early in our marriage, I misread a recipe that called for a teaspoon of salt. I added a tablespoon. Dish, ruined. If you don’t know the difference between cumin and cinnamon, you’re probably in trouble. Once you know what works and what doesn’t, then you can start experimenting with your own ingredient combinations. In writing, I need to know how to write sentences. Long ones and short ones. How to craft paragraphs and dialogue and chapters. When I’ve learned those things, then I can try something new. I used to think the idea of an outline was too inhibiting for creativity. Now, in the midst of my first novel, I’m wishing I’d done some more pre-work. And I bristle when told to read books about style and story structure, but I know they would help.

It’s not all gourmet. I enjoy cooking for my family. But last week, I was craving boxed mac and cheese. I was burnt out from housework and snow days and my body was tired, so that’s what we ate for dinner. Nothing fancy. Not terribly good for us. But it worked for that night. I’m not going to crank out my best writing every time I sit down to write. Maybe not even every fourth time I sit down to write. It’s going to take practice. And time. And I might not ever be a “gourmet” writer. But not everyone wants gourmet all the time. Maybe my mac-and-cheese-in-a-box writing will be just the food someone needs that day.

Trust my gut. While making  the beef stew, a dish I’ve made several times with my husband but never in this house, with this stove, I hit a snag. The first round of “browning” the meat was more like “blacking” the meat. I had the burner turned up too high. I could have pressed on, convinced that I was doing it right, or I could trust my instincts and start over. That’s what I did. I dumped the oil, rinsed out the pan and melted another scoop of shortening at a lower temperature. I don’t know what my writing instincts are right now, but I know if I do it long enough, I’ll be able to trust my gut more and more.

It’s not about me. (Or you.) Ultimately, when I’m cooking, I’m not cooking for myself. And I’m infinitely more satisfied when I share the food I’ve made with other people. While I do write partly for me (because if I didn’t I think my head might literally explode), the end goal is to have other people read my words. So, I’m willing to do what it takes for that to happen. If I have to alter my dream or work a little harder or spend a little more, then I must.

I’ve been cooking for my family for almost seven years now, and I’m still no expert, but I’m getting better and finding my groove. I’ve been writing a lot longer than that, but I’m still a novice in a lot of ways. Whether cooking or writing, I’ve got a lot to learn, but I’m finding joy in the practice.

Not every girl's dream: Review of Princess Ever After by Rachel Hauck

Regina Beswick is a restorer of classic cars. At least, that’s her dream, the one she left her corporate accounting job to pursue. And she’s on the brink of making it a career when a handsome stranger arrives from overseas with some world-shattering news: She’s actually a long-lost princess.

princess ever afterRachel Hauck’s second offering in her Royal Wedding series, Princess Ever After, is everything you want in a modern fairy-tale. There’s a spunky heroine, a handsome hero, and plenty of conflict. (Disclaimer: I received a free digital copy of the book from Litfuse Publicity Group in exchange for my review. And keep reading to find out what the author is giving away to celebrate this release!)

This book has a bit of The Princess Diaries feel to it as Regina weighs her options as the newly found heir to the throne. She prefers the company of cars and working folks to ceremony and pomp, yet she charms most of the people she meets. And Tanner, the government official sent to fetch her from America, is a caught between the man he used to be and the man he wants to become. The sparks fly between them, and the story isn’t easy to walk away from. I stayed up too late to finish it, always the sign of a good book, in my opinion.

What I have loved about both of the books in this series is the fictional countries, part British, part German, Hauck has created, and how much they appeal to my love of all things British. The way Tanner speaks is believable in its foreignness. The point of view is deeply un-American (not anti-American, mind you), which I would think is hard for an American to write. I was impressed in both books with the authentic words Hauck uses for everyday items in the fictional countries.

Princess Ever After is the perfect Valentine’s Day read, and Hauck is one of my new favorite authors.

Want to know more about the author, the book and what others are saying? Go here.

And now for the giveaway and party invitation!

Rachel Hauck is celebrating the release of her latest “swoon”-worthy romance,  Princess Ever After, with a fun $200 “Princess” prize package giveaway and a Facebook “Princess” party on March 6th. Grab your tiaras and RSVP today!

princessever-400-click

One winner will receive:

  • A $200 Visa cash card (buy your very own “princess ever after” gown or tanks of gas for your “royal” ride)
  • Princess Ever After, Once Upon a Prince, and The Wedding Dress by Rachel Hauck

Enter today by clicking one of the icons below. But hurry, the giveaway ends on March 6th. Winner will be announced at Rachel’s “Princess” Facebook Party on March 6th. Connect with Rachel for an evening of “royal” book chat, princess-themed trivia, laughter, prizes, and an exclusive look at the next book in the Royal Wedding series!



So grab your copy of Princess Ever After and join Rachel and friends on the evening of March 6th for a chance to connect and make some new friends. (If you haven’t read the book, don’t let that stop you from coming!)

Don’t miss a moment of the fun; RSVP today. Tell your friends via FACEBOOK or TWITTER and increase your chances of winning. Hope to see you on the 6th!

Why I don't hate Valentine's Day (anymore)

I used to hate Valentine’s Day.

It was a subtle hatred. Well, frankly, it was driven by jealousy, so  maybe it wasn’t really hatred at all. I spent most of my Valentine’s Day single and without a “special someone.” I even wrote a column for the newspaper about how stupid I thought Valentine’s Day was. (I don’t think that was the actual theme. All I can remember is that I rallied the single ladies in our community before Beyonce’s song was even written.)

See, Valentine’s Day used to exaggerate all those lonely, inferior feelings I already struggled with daily. It felt like an exclusive holiday, and I hate being excluded. I didn’t want to be “out” just because I didn’t have a boyfriend. But rather than honestly deal with those feelings, I deflected my insecurities and gave passionate explanations for my feelings.

Love shouldn’t be limited to one day a year.

It’s a Hallmark holiday.

Flowers and candy are a waste of money.

I wouldn’t want a man to celebrate our love just because the calendar says so.

And on and on I went.

Then, 10 years ago, I fell in love. Or maybe love fell on me.

We weren’t dating yet when it happened, but I just knew. I knew that I loved this man, and I was going to be crushed if he didn’t love me back. But I was willing to let that happen because what I felt the day I realized I loved him was bigger than me. We were friends. Probably the best of friends. And I knew going forward that if he didn’t love me back, we couldn’t be friends anymore.

About two months after we started dating.

About two months after we started dating.

That’s storybook stuff, but I can still feel the weight of that realization today.

I loved him. Period. And I had no sure idea how he felt about me.

—

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

Have you ever been asked that question? Ten years ago, I couldn’t have given a good answer. I’m not sure I could today either.

Ten years always seemed so far in the future. Yet, here it is. Like turning the page of a book.

I turned 26 that year. Funny, but it was the same year I started to see the possibilities for my writing beyond newspaper journalism. (That’s something to explore another day, I guess.)

My best friend had started dating a guy in our circle of four, and the fourth member of our group was about to head east for military training. But he gave me a present–a Care Bear I’ve loved nearly to death since then–and a promise, to call while we were apart for three weeks.

It was a glimmer of hope, a memory that still makes me smile. He’s always been good at gift-giving, and this was the first of many meaningful gifts.

He did call. We talked on the phone a couple of times while he was away, and I noticed that my world was grayer without him in it. Our gatherings lacked sparkle because he was absent. (He still lights up my world.)

When I took a week to attend a writers conference on the East Coast, I missed his call one night. I was devastated. I was surrounded by writers, some of whom I’d probably be awed by now if I went back and looked at the names. But this blooming love made me blind to any other experiences. This was all that mattered.

—

We’d spent weeks of our summers at a Bible camp near our hometown, and I first found community at a weekend retreat for the 20-something crowd years earlier. This retreat brought us back to the camp that May, after we’d both returned from our trips.

With some “divine intervention” we found ourselves seated next to each other on a couch for a viewing of The Princess Bride. (It was and is my favorite movie.) I was distracted by his closeness, unable to concentrate on the movie. His arm was resting on the back of the couch, and though it sounds cliche, he eventually got tired of that position and dropped it across my shoulders.

I can still hear the beating of my heart, the questions in my head: What is he doing? Is this what I think it is? Does he mean what I think he means? Is this for real? Am I dreaming?

We were friends. Were we now something more?

I wouldn’t have my answer that night. The movie ended. The spell was broken (so I thought) and we played board games until lights out. I didn’t sleep much that night. And I didn’t want to tell anyone else, afraid that if I did, I would find out I’d imagined it all.

Those fears played with me the next morning. I was sure he would tell me it was all a misunderstanding. That he hadn’t meant anything by it.

Because I was never the pursued one. I was always just a good friend. I was used to rejection. Expected it, almost.

Then he said we should take a walk after breakfast.

And we did. He told me how he felt, and even though I can’t remember the words exactly, I remember how my heart felt like it could fly out of my chest. He held my hand, and we returned from our walk as an “us.”

A year later, at the same camp, he asked me to marry him.

10 years us proposal 1

 10 years us proposal 2

10 years us proposal 3

I said, “yes.”

—

This will be our 10th Valentine’s Day as an “us,” the 7th as a married couple.

Not every year has been the happily ever after I dreamed of.

Some years have been worse than I ever imagined they could be.

But we still love each other.

And not every day brings the tingly toes and speedy heartbeats of those first days.

Most days reality is not at all like a fairytale dream.

But.

That’s why I no longer hate Valentine’s Day.

Because for a day, we tap into those earlier lovey-dovey feelings and remember what it was like.

Before kids.

Before unpaid bills.

Before marriage problems.

We remember why we fell in love and what it felt like.

If our marriage is like a fire, then most days it’s more like embers than flames. But for a day, we can fuel the embers with memories and keep the fire burning.

I’m no marriage expert. We don’t have it all figured out.

But if I’ve learned anything in 10 years it’s that the flame won’t keep burning on its own.

Ours was almost reduced to ashes once, and I never want to be there again.

So, I embrace Valentine’s Day, not because I want jewelry or candy or flowers or an expensive dinner out. Not because I think we HAVE TO celebrate or our relationship is doomed.

No. I embrace Valentine’s Day as a sacred pause. A time to remember. A celebration of joy. A day of gratitude.

—

I know it will be a hard day for some. For ones who’ve lost or never had or feel like they are losing.

And because of that, I say, that those of us who have love on Valentine’s Day ought to share it. Valentine’s Day need not be exclusive to those married, engaged or dating. Because love is more than that.

Whatever you do today, love others. And love well.

Finding buried treasure: Review of The Pirate Queen by Patricia Hickman

Saphora Warren seems to have it all: Married to a successful plastic surgeon, living in a house being featured in Southern Living, with youthful looks that belie her grandmother role.

But on the day Southern Living comes to feature her garden party, Saphora is planning to leave her husband, Bender, for his repeated unfaithfulness. When the party’s over, she packs her bag, intending to retreat to their Outer Banks house for some alone time. But then Bender comes home early and announces he’s dying. Cancer. And her plans vanish into a frenzy of doctor visits and Bender’s convalescence at the very house where Saphora planned to escape.

pirate queenThus the story begins in The Pirate Queen by Patricia Hickman.

The family–sons, daughter, grandkids–gathers at the house as Bender battles cancer. Through surgery and further complications, they all cope in various ways. Saphora busies herself with family, including grandson Eddie who is with them from day 1. When they arrive at the beach house, they meet another boy, Tobias, who they eventually learn is also sick.

Honestly, it’s hard to pin down what I loved about this book. The characters are well-developed, and there’s an air of mystery as Saphora tries to discover why her neighbor stays up late digging holes in his yard. There’s friendship forged in trial and love discovered and rediscovered. It’s not an escape-your-troubles kind of book, but it’s not depressing, either. Hope threads through the pages as Saphora discovers treasures hidden within herself and her marriage.

I don’t read many books whose lead characters are over the age of 50, but it’s not really an issue in this book. Saphora has a strength of character and grace about her that I think most women would envy.

The Pirate Queen is an honest take on how tragedy can transform a person and a relationship.

To learn more, visit the author’s website.

What I really want when I envy the Amish

The first time I saw an Amish buggy in person, I nearly drove my car off the road.

I was newly married, working for a newspaper in central Illinois, on an assignment in a little town called Arthur, where there’s an Amish settlement. In those days, I stared more than is polite, and I asked a lot of really stupid questions. When I had to call an Amish business for a story about a fundraiser, I called the chamber of commerce director first and basically asked her how I was supposed to talk to the Amish.

Back then I wouldn’t have imagined living among them in the Amish tourist capital of the United States (Lancaster County, if you’re not aware). But I did imagine what life might be like for them. I remember driving by a house and watching an Amish woman play with her children in the front yard. (Although now that I think about it, it could have been an older sister instead of a mother, but who knows?) I envied the scene. I wanted nothing more than to stay at home with kids. (Mostly because journalism is a hard job made harder if you’re an introvert.)

Then I got my wish. We moved to Pennsylvania, my husband started seminary and I was a stay-at-home mom. In the years since then, I’ve given up thinking that the Amish live an ideal lifestyle, but I still find myself drawn to their ways at times.

PA farmland

But what is it I think I actually want?

Books have been written on the subject, and I hear people dream of giving it all up and living off the grid like they do, but I don’t think that would solve anything for me.

I like electricity. The threat of losing it for a day or longer throws me into a panic. I like refrigerated food and a washer and dryer to launder our clothes. I like indoor plumbing (I’m not sure all Amish have outhouses) and technology. I like my online life and the ability to stay in touch with family even though we live in another part of the country. I love the ability to travel and expand my view of the world. Do I overuse and overvalue those things? Undoubtedly. But I don’t think I’d want to live without them.  I don’t want to give up my clothes or conform to a way of thinking that might stifle my God-given gifts.

So, really, what do the Amish have that I desire?

For one, there’s an order to their lives. Washing on a certain day. Grocery shopping on another day. And a day dictated by the sun and the natural rhythms of life. I wonder how my life would be different if lights, television and the computer couldn’t keep me up long after the sun went down. In fact, people who were without power last week told a newspaper reporter that they went to bed early those nights.

My life is often disordered and harried, and I’m a slave to a schedule of my own making.

There is value in living an ordered life.

Related to that is rest.

The Amish work hard, yes, but they rest, especially on the Sabbath. No cooking, no cleaning. Sundays are for church or visiting. (This might be a good time to mention that I am not an expert on the Amish. These are observations based on living in this community and books I’ve read by authors I trust to get the details right. I may be wrong in some of these assumptions.)

I don’t get enough rest. Even on Sundays there is still cooking and cleaning to be done. I’m still too busy. I don’t plan rest into my week. And I’m worse for it.

Then, there’s community. They help each other out in times of trial. They take care of their family members in their old age. They take meals together. Cook together. Quilt together. No, they’re not perfect. They’re people who quarrel and envy and hurt each other, but they model a togetherness that is foreign to most of us.

Order.

Rest.

Community.

I could learn a lot from the Amish about these ways.

Just don’t expect to see me in Plain clothing anytime soon.

When you're used to sitting on the sidelines: Review of It Had to Be You by Susan May Warren {plus author interview}

Susan May Warren could write a story about every person in the town of Deep Haven, Minnesota, and I wouldn’t tire of reading them. She continues her new series about a Deep Haven family with the release of It Had to Be You. (Disclaimer: I got a free digital copy of the book from Tyndale House Publishers in exchange for my review.)

it had to be youThe second in the Christiansen family series, It Had to Be You focuses on two of the family’s adult children: Eden, an obits clerk for a Twin Cities newspaper with aspirations to be a reporter, and Owen, a recent addition to a professional hockey team. It’s Eden’s story, though, as she uncovers her purpose apart from supporting her siblings in their talents. She’s floundering at her job, desperate to break into reporting while trying to keep her brother out of trouble with his newfound fame. Then, there’s Jace Jacobsen, the team captain who thinks he’s only good at hockey and is at a career crossroads. When a tragedy brings them together at the hospital, they encounter a John Doe coma patient and team up to find out who he is.

I sometimes wonder if I’m going to enjoy another Deep Haven story. This one is set mostly in and around the Twin Cities but features familiar characters from the fictional town and a weekend visit to the Christiansen lodge. The realistic relationships and charming setting combine to make me want to spend a weekend or longer on the shores of Lake Superior. (And I am NOT a winter person. At least not an outdoor winter person.)

If you’re a hockey fan, this is a story for you, too. Much of the story revolves around hockey. I don’t consider myself a hockey fan, but with the winter Olympics starting today, I can appreciate a good behind-the-athlete story. Though fiction, this will put you in the mood to cheer for your favorite athletes and be inspired by their dedication and struggles.

I loved this story as much as any of the Deep Haven stories. I understand Eden’s unrealized dreams, her passion for stories, and the feeling that she’s the family cheerleader, without her own God-given purpose. I’m loving these family stories that show us a little bit of each character each time, and I look forward to more.

Read on for an interview from the author about the Christiansen family books!

Interview with Susan May Warren

1. This is the second installment in a new six-book series. Can you give us a bit of background on this series? pic_full_warren_susanmay

The Christiansen Family series is a spin-off of the bestselling Deep Haven collection, stories about the townspeople of Deep Haven, Minnesota, a tiny resort town on the north shore of Lake Superior. The original series started with a book titled Happily Ever After and grew to include six titles. However, one family began to stand out, and we decided their story needed to be told. We wanted a series about a family with adult children learning what it meant to carry on the legacy of faith into their lives. And I wanted to write a series that would really let readers dig into the family, feel like they were a part of their journey.

2. This Christiansen Family series is set in Deep Haven, Minnesota. Tell us about this setting.

It’s a gorgeous place to set a story—on the rocky shores of Lake Superior, in a tiny town where everyone knows your name. It’s a town with a rich heritage, strong ties, and a place where people want to escape—in fiction and in real life (as it is modeled after my town of Grand Marais, Minnesota). You’ll find people from all walks of life here—and most importantly, Evergreen Resort, run by the Christiansen family for four generations.

3. What is your hope for this series?

Of course, I hope people fall as much in love with the Christiansens as I have. They’re a great bunch—all led by John and Ingrid Christiansen, who have tried to instill their values into their children. But each child has their own path to walk, and part of the series is just watching as they walk that path—through the good and the bad, trying to figure out where their faith and their parents’ legacy fit into their lives. It’s a contemporary epic family series set in the wilds of northern Minnesota with romance, suspense, and lots of great family drama!

4. What was your inspiration for this particular book and the main character Eden Christiansen?

Eden Christiansen came from a number of places. Watching the siblings of movie stars and athletes, watching my own daughter cheer her athlete brothers, even watching my friends, parents who feel on the sidelines of their children’s lives . . . maybe even a little left behind as they leave for college. I began to wonder—what if you had an amazing sibling, and your entire family focused on his or her successes, and you felt left behind, void of your own amazingness? This is Eden—who feels like she hasn’t accomplished anything and is sitting on the sidelines of her life. She feels like she needs to “get into the game” but doesn’t know how or where to start. And she feels like she really has nothing spectacular to offer . . .

But God has different plans . . .

5. Did you base the character of Jace Jacobsen on anyone in particular?

Jace was loosely modeled after famed Minnesota Wild enforcer Derek Boogaard, who died, in part, due to the many concussions he suffered as a hockey player. The problem of concussions with today’s athletes, especially in hockey and football, can be life-threatening for athletes, and although hockey (and football!) is played much differently today, it’s still an issue.

I wanted Jace to have the opposite problem from Eden—he is only good at one thing. In fact, he’s spectacular at it, but he believes if he walks away from it, he will be nothing. So same problem . . . different perspective. It gave me a good opportunity as an author to examine our “worth.”

Of course, adding the John Doe element only rounded that theme out with yet another perspective. I loved how these three angles came together.

6. What lessons or truths will your readers find in the pages of this novel?

I think we all need to see our worth not in relationship to our external successes but in how we work out the task God has for us. How we love one another, how we use our gifts and talents. How we abide with God in our daily lives. Hopefully readers will begin seeing their worth in a new way.

7. How do you expect this new series to resonate with your audience? How do you want your books to make them feel?

I am hoping readers walk away from this book, and this series, with hope. The sense that they belong to something—to God, to family—and the feeling that our lives are not chaotic or out of control, but that God has a unique and amazing journey for each of us, and it’s lived out within our relationships. I want them to feel as if they’d found a new set of friends.

8. Have you received any feedback from your fans on this series? What are they saying?

People fell immediately in love with Darek and his sweet son, Tiger, in Take a Chance on Me, and I think readers will really enjoy Jace and Eden’s romance in this story. I’m thankful that people enjoy the work I put into developing my characters and the romance, and I have loved diving into these multilayered stories about people with realistic, everyday struggles.

9. As a writer, what did you particularly enjoy about crafting this story?

I loved writing about Minnesota in the winter. And I loved the story of John Doe and uncovering who he might be. (I plotted it like a mystery, so it was
fun to revisit my mystery-plotting techniques). I especially loved the layers of Jace, the hero, and how, with every turn, he became more intriguing.

10. What is the best advice or encouragement that you have received?

Try to up your writing game with each book, and just keep writing. Not every story appeals to every reader, but I try to write a story I would enjoy—and then hopefully my readers will also.

11. In your writing career, what are you most proud of?

I think I’ve stayed true to who I am and the kind of story I’m supposed to be writing. I’m very blessed by my reader friends and their constant encouragement. I am very blessed to spend my days with the Christiansen family!